The graph shows children by age group as a percentage of the young population in the United Kingdom between 1990 and 2001.

Sample Response

1

The line graph gives data on the proportion of children with respectrespects to the total young population in the UK between 1990 and 2001. The proportion of children are categories in four age groups. Overall, the proportion of children aged 0–4ratio of infants, between 0 to 4 years old, declined over the period while the percentage of 10- to 14-year-olds10 to 14 years youngsters’ percentage increased in the UK. As can be seen in the diagram, just over a quarter of the UK's young population was aged 15 to 19the UK children was 15 to 19 years old in 1990 while a similar proportion was aged 0 to 4while a similar proportion was 0 to 4 years old at that time. Just over 24% of young people in BritainJust over 24% of young British were between 5 andto 9 years old while 23% of the young population23% of them were 10 to 14 years old. With an increase from 1990 to 1992, the proportion of infants kept on decreasing and in 2001 accounted for over 23% of total youth. With a steady slump till 1996, 15-19 years old constituted a quarter of young British in 2001. MeanwhileMoving further, British children aged 10–1410-14 years British formed the largest age groupdominated the young generation in the UK with a steady increase in their percentage over the periodin later years after having the smallest proportion in 1990despite their least proportion in early years. Finally, British children aged 5–95-9 years British children were over 26% during 1995-1997 but their proportionratio declined and finally stood at just over 25% in 2001.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response's strongest feature is broad coverage: all four age groups are discussed and the overview correctly notes the fall among 0–4-year-olds and rise among 10–14-year-olds. However, the single-paragraph presentation weakens organisation, and several trend descriptions are imprecise, especially the claimed steady fall in the 15–19 group to 1996. Prioritise grouping the lines by trend and reporting turning points accurately, then proofread age-group noun phrases and agreement.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

6.5
Scoring rule

The overview captures two major opposing trends and all four groups receive relevant figures, but several movements and time spans are reported imprecisely.

Next step

Describe the 15–19 group's fall only to 1994 before its recovery and give accurate turning points for the 0–4 and 5–9 groups.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Ideas move from an overview through the four series in a generally understandable order, but the entire report is compressed into one paragraph.

Next step

Separate the overview and group the declining and rising age categories into distinct detail paragraphs.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

The response uses a reasonable range of trend language, though repeated words such as 'ratio' and awkward phrases like 'young British' reduce naturalness.

Next step

Use precise terms such as 'share', '0–4 age group', 'young population', 'fell', and 'recovered'.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

Both simple and complex structures are attempted, but agreement, plural forms, prepositions, and age-group noun phrases contain recurring errors.

Next step

Proofread constructions such as 'the proportions are divided', 'children aged 15–19 were', and 'between 0 and 4 years old'.

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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The graph shows children by age group as a percentage of the young population in the United Kingdom between 1990 and 2001.

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