The pie charts show the highest education level of women in Sri Lanka in 1965 and 1995.
Sample Response
The pie charts compare the women's educational attainmentfemale education scenarios in Sri Lanka in 1965 and 1995. OverallAs is obvious, the level of female education in Sri Lanka improved markedlyremarkably progressed within three decades. In detailGetting back to the details, more than one-third of Sri Lankan females never attended schoolschools in 1965 while only 3% held a graduate qualificationcompleted their graduation. No woman in 1965No woman in this year was awarded a post graduate degree while almost half of Sri Lankan women had completed only six years of educationbarely completed their primary education. In this year, 18% of women18% female received their 12th-grade diploma and the overall education level amongin Sri Lankan women was dismal. However, after three decades, this scenario changed dramatically, aschanged exceptionally when one in every five Sri Lankan women held a postgraduate qualificationhold a post-graduate qualification and no woman was unschooled. Exactly one-quarter of them completed 12th gradegrades while graduate women comprised 35%. It is worth noticing that no women in this period were uneducated and that was a remarkable progress in terms of women education in Sri Lanka. Finally, 20% female in this year completed their primary education which was exactly the same ratio of post graduate women in this year.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response identifies the strong rise in women’s educational attainment and reports every category with accurate figures, making the main change easy to understand. Its effectiveness is reduced by presenting the entire report as one paragraph and by recurring agreement and noun-form errors. Divide the details by year or education level, then proofread agreement, articles, and plural forms.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview is supported by accurate coverage of all five education categories in both years and relevant comparisons.
Keep interpretations neutral by replacing subjective descriptions of the education level with direct evidence from the proportions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The progression from 1965 to 1995 is clear, but the entire response forms one dense paragraph and repeats time references.
Separate the overview from two logically grouped detail paragraphs and vary references to the two years.
Lexical Resource
The response uses varied vocabulary for qualifications, proportions, and change, although some choices are awkward or overly evaluative.
Prefer neutral, natural combinations such as educational attainment, held a qualification, and completed six years of schooling.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures is attempted, but errors with agreement, articles, plurals, and noun forms recur throughout the report.
Check that percentage expressions take correct plural nouns and that each subject agrees with its verb.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie charts show the highest education level of women in Sri Lanka in 1965 and 1995.
Your response
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