The pie charts below give data on the spending and consumption of resources by countries of the world and how the population is distributed.
Sample Response
The pie charts below provide information about the global population and spending and consumption of resources based on the different factors.
The first Pie chart shows the spending of people as mentioned people spend 24% on food and 18% on transport. Spending on houses is 12%, half on clothing and the remaining 40% on other resources. Moving ahead, USA & Europe consume resources totalling 60% of the world and remaining 40% by other nations.
Asia has the most highly populated part of the world, which covers more than half of the world population, which is 57%, and Africa covers 10%. Both Europe and America equally contributed to the world’s population by 14% and 5% by the other nations.
Overall, the USA and Europe have the same population and use the same number of resources, which is more than the other nations and Asia, which has the highest region in population, uses very few resources than other countries.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise reference Original: the different factors Suggested revision: the categories shown Why it matters: This wording identifies the chart categories more precisely.
- 2. Identify chart accurately Original: first Pie chart Suggested revision: world-spending chart Why it matters: The visual contains three charts, so naming this one avoids an unclear sequence reference.
- 3. Use concise wording Original: the spending of people Suggested revision: global spending Why it matters: This is a more concise description of the measure shown.
- 4. Repair sentence structure Original: as mentioned people spend 24% Suggested revision: with 24% spent Why it matters: The original phrase creates an ungrammatical run-on structure.
- 5. Match chart label Original: houses Suggested revision: housing Why it matters: The category shown in the visual is housing, not houses.
- 6. State exact share Original: half on clothing Suggested revision: 6% on clothing Why it matters: The chart gives clothing as 6%, which is half of the housing share.
- 7. Match spending category Original: resources Suggested revision: categories Why it matters: The 40% segment belongs to world spending and is labelled Others.
- 8. Clarify comparison Original: Moving ahead Suggested revision: In comparison Why it matters: This transition makes the shift to the resource-consumption chart explicit.
- 9. Use formal wording Original: USA & Europe Suggested revision: the USA and Europe Why it matters: Write the conjunction in full in formal academic prose.
- 10. Name the measure Original: 60% of the world Suggested revision: 60% of the world's resources Why it matters: The figure represents resource consumption rather than 60% of the world itself.
- 11. Complete the clause Original: remaining 40% by other nations Suggested revision: the remaining 40% is consumed by other countries Why it matters: The original wording lacks the verb needed to complete the comparison.
- 12. Describe proportion accurately Original: most highly populated part of the world Suggested revision: largest share of the world's population Why it matters: The chart reports population shares rather than population density.
Suggested Rewrites
- the different factors the categories shown
- first Pie chart world-spending chart
- the spending of people global spending
- as mentioned people spend 24% with 24% spent
- houses housing
- half on clothing 6% on clothing
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response covers all three charts and reports most figures accurately, with a generally clear comparison between population shares and resource use. Its main limitation is an imprecise overview that treats the combined USA-and-Europe consumption figure as if the two regions used equal amounts, while several awkward sentences blur comparisons. Prioritise a fully accurate overview that contrasts Asia's population dominance with the disproportionate resource consumption of the USA and Europe.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report addresses all three charts and includes most key percentages, but the overview makes an unsupported claim about equal resource use by the USA and Europe.
State only comparisons supported by the grouped data, emphasising Asia's large population share against the USA and Europe's combined 60% resource consumption.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is grouped by chart and progresses clearly, although some long sentences contain loosely connected comparisons and repetitive wording.
Use shorter comparison sentences and clearer referencing so each relationship between regions, population, and consumption is immediately evident.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of data-reporting vocabulary, but collocations such as “highest region in population” and “very few resources than” are imprecise.
Use conventional comparative phrases such as “largest share of the population” and “consumes far fewer resources.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms is attempted, but recurring article, agreement, and clause-structure errors reduce control.
Check subject-verb agreement and restructure overloaded relative clauses into complete, accurately punctuated sentences.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie charts below give data on the spending and consumption of resources by countries of the world and how the population is distributed.
Your response
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