The chart below shows the percentage of young people in higher education in four different countries in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Sample Response
The yielded bar charts demonstrate four different countries namely Country A, County B, County C and County D young students percentage in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Overall, ut can be clearly seen that year by year proportion was rose in all countries except Country B. Additionally, County D had the highest percentage in all years.
For Country A, in 2000, young people who studying higher education was 38% which grew dramatically and continuously roughly one in tenth percentage per half a decade. In 2010 had 62%. For Country B and C, the percentage was identical in 2010 although, later it differ. Former one nation proportion drop 5% after 5 years and remained at 43% in final year. However, later country percentage rose and remained unchanged till 2010, it had same proportion as County A had in 2005.
For Country D, with the highest proportion in 2000, this country had on account of 64% which surged later, between 2000 and 2005, it climbed sharply 14%. In 2010 percentage was four in fifth and between a decade, it rose 16% which was second highest after Country A.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct typo Original: ut Suggested revision: it Why it matters: The pronoun is misspelled.
- 2. Fix verb form Original: year by year proportion was rose Suggested revision: the proportion rose over time Why it matters: The passive construction is ungrammatical, and the noun needs a determiner.
- 3. Correct country label Original: County Suggested revision: Country Why it matters: The chart labels this category as Country D.
- 4. Use plural noun Original: Country Suggested revision: Countries Why it matters: The plural form is needed when referring to two countries.
- 5. Correct year comparison Original: the percentage was identical in 2010 although, later it differ Suggested revision: their percentages were identical in 2000, although they differed later Why it matters: The chart shows both countries at 46% in 2000, while their later figures differ.
- 6. Clarify subject and tense Original: Former one nation proportion drop 5% Suggested revision: Country B's proportion dropped by 5 percentage points Why it matters: The original phrase lacks a clear subject, possessive form, and past-tense verb.
- 7. Add article Original: in final year Suggested revision: in the final year Why it matters: The definite article is required before this specific year reference.
- 8. Use latter correctly Original: later country percentage Suggested revision: the latter country's percentage Why it matters: The latter correctly refers to Country C and requires a possessive form.
- 9. Fix sentence boundary Original: remained unchanged till 2010, Suggested revision: remained unchanged until 2010; Why it matters: A semicolon correctly separates the two independent clauses.
- 10. Add article Original: it had same proportion Suggested revision: it had the same proportion Why it matters: The fixed comparison requires the definite article.
- 11. Correct country label Original: County Suggested revision: Country Why it matters: The chart uses Country A rather than County A.
- 12. Add determiner Original: In 2010 percentage Suggested revision: In 2010, the percentage Why it matters: A comma and definite article are needed in this construction.
Suggested Rewrites
- ut it
- year by year proportion was rose the proportion rose over time
- County Country
- Country Countries
- the percentage was identical in 2010 although, later it differ their percentages were identical in 2000, although they differed later
- Former one nation proportion drop 5% Country B's proportion dropped by 5 percentage points
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response's strongest feature is its clear overview, which correctly identifies Country D as consistently highest and Country B as the only country without an overall rise. However, several comparisons are inaccurate or confusing, and frequent grammatical and collocational errors sometimes obscure the intended meaning. The highest priority is to report each country's figures precisely in straightforward sentences, especially the contrasting patterns for Countries B and C.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response gives an accurate overview and covers all four countries, but it misstates the 2010 comparison between Countries B and C and inaccurately says Country B remained at 43%.
Check every numerical comparison against the chart and describe Country B's fall from 46% to 41% followed by its slight recovery to 43%.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overview and country-based paragraphing create a broadly clear progression, although unclear references such as 'former one nation' and 'later country' weaken cohesion.
Name each country directly and use simple comparison links so that every reference and contrast is immediately clear.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant trend vocabulary, including 'identical,' 'surged,' and 'remained unchanged,' but frequent word-choice and word-form errors reduce precision.
Use accurate chart collocations such as 'the proportion rose by 14 percentage points' and avoid unsuitable phrases such as 'yielded bar charts' and 'on account of 64%.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex structures, but frequent errors with agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction make several clauses difficult to follow.
Prioritize complete subject-verb structures and accurate past-tense forms, for example 'the proportion rose' and 'young people studying in higher education accounted for 38%.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the percentage of young people in higher education in four different countries in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.