You are planning a holiday in another country and would like a friend to accompany you. Write a letter to the friend asking him/her to join you. In your letter explain: - why you are taking a holiday - what your holiday plan is - why you would like him/her to go with you
Same question Compare 2 different answersSample Response
Dear Robin, I haven’t heard from you in a while, so I hope that everything is well with you. You'd be excited to hear that I'm going to visit Germany to enjoy a surprise holiday at the beginning of the next month, and I want you to go with me because I know how you've always liked a country like Germany for managing to rise like a phoenix from the rubble of the most devastating war in human history. I am taking this one-week holiday because my company has granted me a leave recently for completing a difficult project way ahead of its delivery date. I chose Germany as the destination because of its extraordinary beauty and distinctive culture. Now, as for the holiday plans, we'll stay in the beautiful city of Cologne where we will visit some of the oldest universities in Europe and one of the largest and most beautifully built Cathedrals. After that, we'll head to the Rhine Valley which arguably has some of the most beautiful landscapes in entire Germany. Then, of course, we'll enjoy the gentle cruise in the Rhine River while looking at the charming riverside town. Finally, beautiful castles are something which we should never want to miss. So, let me know what you think about my plans. Warm wishes, Thomas
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove unnecessary article Original: at the beginning of the next month Suggested revision: at the beginning of next month Why it matters: The fixed phrase for the immediately following month does not take “the” before “next month”.
- 2. Use uncountable leave Original: granted me a leave Suggested revision: granted me leave Why it matters: “Leave” is uncountable when it means authorised time away from work.
- 3. Clarify time and cause Original: recently for completing Suggested revision: after I completed Why it matters: This revision clearly connects the leave to the completed project.
- 4. Lowercase common noun Original: Cathedrals Suggested revision: cathedrals Why it matters: A common plural noun should not be capitalised here.
- 5. Add required article Original: in entire Germany Suggested revision: in the whole of Germany Why it matters: “Entire Germany” requires a determiner in this construction.
- 6. Improve cruise collocation Original: the gentle cruise Suggested revision: a relaxing cruise Why it matters: “Relaxing cruise” is a more natural collocation for this holiday activity.
- 7. Use correct preposition Original: in Suggested revision: on Why it matters: A cruise takes place “on” a river rather than “in” it.
- 8. Match general reference Original: town Suggested revision: towns Why it matters: The plural better matches a cruise that passes multiple unspecified settlements.
- 9. Remove awkward phrasing Original: something which we should never want to miss Suggested revision: something we should not miss Why it matters: The original combination of “never” and “want to miss” is unnecessarily convoluted.
- 10. Use smoother opening Original: I haven’t heard from you in a while Suggested revision: It’s been a while since I heard from you Why it matters: This phrasing creates a more natural opening to a friendly letter.
- 11. Link opening smoothly Original: so I hope that everything is well with you Suggested revision: and I hope everything is well with you Why it matters: The additive link is more natural because the second clause does not express a result.
- 12. Use project collocation Original: way ahead of its delivery date Suggested revision: well ahead of its deadline Why it matters: Projects are normally completed ahead of a deadline rather than a delivery date.
Suggested Rewrites
- at the beginning of the next month at the beginning of next month
- granted me a leave granted me leave
- recently for completing after I completed
- Cathedrals cathedrals
- in entire Germany in the whole of Germany
- the gentle cruise a relaxing cruise
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter fully addresses the invitation, reason for the holiday, and itinerary, while its warm voice and specific travel details make the message engaging and convincing. Its main limitation is occasional wordiness and several unnatural collocations, particularly in the opening and travel descriptions. Prioritise shorter sentences and more idiomatic phrasing so the clear ideas sound consistently natural and polished.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose is clear, all three bullet points are fully covered, and the friendly tone suits a letter to a close friend.
Make the personal reason for wanting Robin specifically as a companion slightly more direct and concise.
Coherence and Cohesion
The ideas follow a clear sequence from the invitation and reason to the itinerary, supported by appropriate linking expressions.
Divide the body into purposeful paragraphs and shorten the long opening sentence to improve readability.
Lexical Resource
A varied vocabulary conveys enthusiasm and describes the destination vividly, although several collocations sound unnatural.
Use more idiomatic combinations such as a cruise on the Rhine and landscapes in the whole of Germany.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex structures is used with generally secure control, and the few errors do not impede meaning.
Refine article and preposition choices, especially in phrases such as the beginning of next month and the whole of Germany.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are planning a holiday in another country and would like a friend to accompany you. Write a letter to the friend asking him/her to join you. In your letter explain:
- why you are taking a holiday
- what your holiday plan is
- why you would like him/her to go with you
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.