You are applying for a job and need a letter of reference from someone who knew you when you were at college. Write a letter to one of your old teachers asking for a reference. In your letter: say what job you have applied for explain why you want this job suggest what information the teacher should include
Sample Response
Dear Mr Joey Morgan, It is great to have this opportunity to communicate with a great and learned person like you again, and I also hope that you are doing well. Actually, I am writing this letter to request you to write me a letter of reference since I have applied for the position of Quality Control Officer at a very prestigious garments factory in our country. By the way, this job would prove out to be important for me since it would allow me to gain some valuable experience in different kinds of garments items before starting my own clothing exporting business someday. The garments factory authority has no problem with my qualifications, skills and other credentials, but they want to learn a bit more about my academic life, extra-curricular activities, soft skills as well as my professional life, and hence the request for the reference letter. They want to know things like how serious and punctual student I really was as a college student, and what soft skills I had as a student. So, I would like to request you to prepare a letter of reference for me so that I can finally get the job to fulfil my ultimate career aspiration. Yours sincerely, Peter Comb
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Natural politeness Original: a great and learned person like you Suggested revision: such a respected teacher Why it matters: The original sounds exaggerated and less natural for a reference request.
- 2. Remove filler Original: Actually, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: The request is clearer if it begins directly without a conversational filler.
- 3. Request pattern Original: request you to write me Suggested revision: ask you to write Why it matters: "Ask you to" is more natural than "request you to" in this sentence.
- 4. Industry wording Original: prestigious garments factory Suggested revision: prestigious garment factory Why it matters: Use "garment" as an attributive noun before "factory".
- 5. Formal transition Original: By the way, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This phrase sounds too casual and does not add useful cohesion.
- 6. Awkward phrase Original: would prove out to be important Suggested revision: would be important Why it matters: "Prove out to be" is unnatural in this context.
- 7. Noun phrase Original: garments items Suggested revision: garment products Why it matters: This is a more natural noun phrase for the industry.
- 8. Natural subject Original: garments factory authority Suggested revision: The factory management Why it matters: This sounds more natural than "authority" in a job application context.
- 9. Consistent spelling Original: extra-curricular activities Suggested revision: extracurricular activities Why it matters: The closed form is now more common and reads smoothly.
- 10. Missing article Original: how serious and punctual student Suggested revision: how serious and punctual a student Why it matters: The noun phrase needs the article before "student".
- 11. Less inflated Original: ultimate career aspiration Suggested revision: long-term career goal Why it matters: This is more natural and less exaggerated.
- 12. Sentence rewrite Original: It is great to have this opportunity to communicate with a great and learned person like you again, and I also hope that you are doing well. Suggested revision: I hope you are well. It is a pleasure to contact you again after my time at college. Why it matters: The rewrite is warmer, shorter, and less exaggerated.
Suggested Rewrites
- a great and learned person like you such a respected teacher
- Actually, Delete
- request you to write me ask you to write
- prestigious garments factory prestigious garment factory
- By the way, Delete
- would prove out to be important would be important
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The response clearly asks an old teacher for a reference, identifies the Quality Control Officer role, explains the career reason, and suggests relevant information to include. The purpose is achieved, though some details are wordy and the exact relationship from college could be sharper.
Add one specific reminder of your college course or achievement so the teacher has clearer reference material.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter has a clear overall progression, but it is written as one dense paragraph and uses some conversational transitions such as "Actually" and "By the way" that weaken formal cohesion.
Divide the letter into three paragraphs and use direct topic sentences rather than casual linking phrases.
Lexical Resource
There is a good range of vocabulary related to employment, qualifications, and career plans. Some collocations are awkward or overblown, including "prove out to be important" and "garments items".
Replace inflated phrases with precise work-related language and avoid repeating "soft skills" and "reference letter" unnecessarily.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Most sentences are understandable and several complex structures are attempted. Accuracy is reduced by article errors, word order problems, and long sentences with too many clauses.
Shorten the longest sentences and check article and word-order patterns such as "a serious and punctual student".