You have recently moved to a different house. Write a letter to an English speaking friend to tell them about it. In your letter: - Explain why you have moved - Describe the new apartment - Invite him to pay a visit
Sample Response
Dear Ewatomi How are you, and how is work going? I hope you’re having enough rest. I am writing to inform you that i moved to a different house, as i have been telling you about the poor security at my old house, thieves are always intruding, carting away with our belongings, as the house was not fenced and neither has a security guard. My new apartment is located just few miles away from the main road, its fenced with electrical wires round the whole fence, also its very spacious, well painted, there is also a pool and a flower garden and above all it’s very close to my place of work. I really cant wait to have you around, as I hope you’d come to visit whenever you’re off duty. Lots of Love KDJ
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Punctuate the salutation Original: Dear Ewatomi How Suggested revision: Dear Ewatomi, How Why it matters: A comma should close the salutation before the opening message begins.
- 2. Use natural phrasing Original: having Suggested revision: getting Why it matters: Getting enough rest is the natural collocation in this context.
- 3. Fix tense and case Original: that i moved Suggested revision: that I have moved Why it matters: The present perfect suits a recent move with current relevance, and I must be capitalised.
- 4. Start a new sentence Original: , as i have been telling you Suggested revision: . I have told you before Why it matters: This revision separates two ideas and removes the awkward continuous form.
- 5. Repair the comma splice Original: at my old house, thieves are always intruding Suggested revision: at my old house: thieves were always breaking in Why it matters: A colon correctly introduces the explanation, and the past tense matches the former home.
- 6. Correct the expression Original: carting away with our belongings Suggested revision: making off with our belongings Why it matters: Make off with is the correct expression for stealing and carrying belongings away.
- 7. Use parallel structure Original: as the house was not fenced and neither has a security guard Suggested revision: because the house was neither fenced nor guarded Why it matters: Neither...nor creates a grammatical parallel description in the past tense.
- 8. Add the article Original: just few miles Suggested revision: just a few miles Why it matters: The countable expression a few requires the article.
- 9. Use the verb form Original: its fenced Suggested revision: it is fenced Why it matters: The sentence needs the subject and verb rather than the possessive form its.
- 10. Use precise wording Original: electrical wires round the whole fence Suggested revision: electric wires around the entire perimeter Why it matters: This wording describes the security feature more naturally and precisely.
- 11. Separate the description Original: , also its very spacious Suggested revision: . It is also very spacious Why it matters: A new sentence prevents a run-on and supplies the correct subject-verb form.
- 12. Link the features Original: well painted, there is also Suggested revision: freshly painted, and it has Why it matters: This revision coordinates the apartment's features without a comma splice.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Ewatomi How Dear Ewatomi, How
- having getting
- that i moved that I have moved
- , as i have been telling you . I have told you before
- at my old house, thieves are always intruding at my old house: thieves were always breaking in
- carting away with our belongings making off with our belongings
Why this response received Band 6.0
The letter’s strongest feature is its clear, relevant explanation of the move and its concrete description of the new apartment in an appropriately warm voice. Its main limitation is that it is under length and compresses nearly all content into long, comma-linked sentences, leaving the invitation thinly developed. The highest-priority improvement is to add a specific visiting plan and organise the three purposes into separate paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are addressed, but the short response develops the invitation only briefly and offers limited detail beyond the main facts.
Expand the invitation with a suggested date, practical directions, or an activity to do together while keeping the friendly tone.
Coherence and Cohesion
The content follows the task’s order, but the single-paragraph format and long chains of clauses weaken cohesion and readability.
Give the reason, apartment description, and invitation their own paragraphs and use shorter sentences within each section.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficient and sometimes specific, especially for security and apartment features, although several word combinations are inaccurate.
Use natural combinations such as “a few miles,” “surrounded by an electric fence,” and “stealing our belongings.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The intended meaning remains clear, but frequent comma splices, missing apostrophes, capitalization errors, and faulty clause structures reduce accuracy.
Rewrite each long sentence as two or three complete sentences and proofread carefully for pronouns, apostrophes, and verb agreement.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have recently moved to a different house. Write a letter to an English speaking friend to tell them about it. In your letter:
- Explain why you have moved
- Describe the new apartment
- Invite him to pay a visit
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.