You would like your child to have a day off from school for a special family celebration. Write a letter to the principal and in your letter: - Describe the family celebration - Say why it’s important for your child to be there - Explain how your child will catch up on the work missed You do NOT need to include addresses. ………………..,
Sample Response
Dear Professor Jones,
I am writing to ask if it would be possible for my daughter to be absent from school on the first Monday of next month. I completely understand that the school has a strict policy regarding absences; however, I hope that, given the circumstances, on this occasion permission could be granted.
The reason for this special request is that her brother is getting married the day before and the wedding is taking place quite a distance away from our hometown. This means that we will be travelling back home on the Monday and will not arrive until late in the evening. Obviously, her brother would be devastated and heart-broken if she were unable to attend this special family occasion.
As she will be missing a whole day of school, I envisage that there will be classwork to catch up on and this will be done as soon as she returns to school. As you know, my daughter is an incredibly conscientious and diligent student and will be keen to be up-to-date with her studies as soon as possible. I can assure you that missing these classes will not have a detrimental effect on Sarah’s academic progress.
Please contact me if you would like to discuss this further. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours sincerely,
John Smith
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Make the reason direct Original: The reason for this special request is that Suggested revision: I am making this request because Why it matters: The revision states the reason more directly and concisely.
- 2. Use more formal wording Original: quite a distance away from our hometown Suggested revision: a considerable distance from our hometown Why it matters: Considerable distance is more precise and appropriately formal for this letter.
- 3. Avoid presuming agreement Original: Obviously, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: Obviously can sound presumptuous when explaining the importance of the occasion to the principal.
- 4. Moderate the emotional tone Original: devastated and heart-broken Suggested revision: very disappointed Why it matters: The revised wording conveys the importance of attendance in a measured formal tone.
- 5. Name the occasion clearly Original: this special family occasion Suggested revision: the wedding Why it matters: Referring directly to the wedding is clearer and avoids unnecessary repetition.
- 6. Avoid an unsupported assumption Original: As you know, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: The letter should not assume that the principal already knows the student's qualities.
- 7. Remove unnecessary hyphens Original: up-to-date Suggested revision: up to date Why it matters: This compound is normally unhyphenated when it follows the verb be.
- 8. Sentence rewrite Original: As she will be missing a whole day of school, I envisage that there will be classwork to catch up on and this will be done as soon as she returns to school. Suggested revision: As she will miss a whole day of school, I understand that she will have classwork to catch up on, and she will complete it as soon as she returns. Why it matters: Giving the daughter an active role makes the catch-up plan clearer and less vague.
- 9. Identify the student Suggested revision: Add your daughter's full name and class in the opening request. Why it matters: These details would help the principal identify the student whose absence is being requested.
Suggested Rewrites
- The reason for this special request is that I am making this request because
- quite a distance away from our hometown a considerable distance from our hometown
- Obviously, Delete
- devastated and heart-broken very disappointed
- this special family occasion the wedding
- As you know, Delete
Why this response received Band 8.0
This is a polished, appropriately formal request that explains the celebration, the daughter's need to attend, and the plan for missed work in a convincing and well-organised way. The main limitation is that the catch-up arrangement remains somewhat general rather than operationally specific. The highest-priority improvement is to state exactly how the missed classwork will be obtained and completed.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The letter achieves its purpose, covers every bullet point, and sustains a suitable respectful tone with well-developed supporting detail.
Specify how the daughter will collect assignments or notes and when she will submit the completed work.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear sequence, with each paragraph serving a distinct communicative function and cohesive devices used smoothly.
Keep the catch-up paragraph more tightly focused by placing the practical plan before reassurance about academic progress.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise, and well suited to a formal request, with expressions such as conscientious, diligent, and detrimental effect used naturally.
Use slightly less emphatic wording where appropriate so the importance of attendance sounds persuasive without seeming overstated.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex sentence forms is handled accurately, and punctuation supports fluent reading throughout.
For further refinement, reduce occasional heavy sentence openings and favour the most concise available structure.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You would like your child to have a day off from school for a special family celebration. Write a letter to the principal and in your letter:
- Describe the family celebration
- Say why it’s important for your child to be there
- Explain how your child will catch up on the work missed You do NOT need to include addresses. ………………..,
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.