You live in an area where some sports facilities are needed for people your age. Write a letter to local authorities. In your letter: - Mention the existing facilities - Ask for more facilities to be built - Explain how these facilities will be useful for people your age.
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter in regards to, request you to provide more additional facilities to our locality. My name is Anish, and I am from the Thrissur district.
As you may be aware, in our local council a limited number of facilities are only available for both amateur and professional athletes for their regular usage. Most of the facilities are in improper condition for usage. Furthermore, because of this dire situation, youngsters are not able to continue their regular practices.
Very recently, we understand that authorities are planning to provide extra financial support for upcoming generations for their better practices. I kindly request you provide additional monetary support to our locality. I think this initiation will enhance their focus, and they can achieve great goals in their life. Apart from this, this monetary support will help them to purchase more pieces of equipment and renovation of our older clubhouse.
Lastly, we are planning to add more people in different age groups to our local club. We are planning for Yoga, Zumba, and Aerobic classes for different age groups. These classes may help them to overcome the sedentary lifestyle in different age groups.
I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Yours Sincerely,
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use correct location Original: council Suggested revision: area Why it matters: Facilities are located in an area rather than in a council as an institution.
- 2. Place limiting adverb Original: a limited number of facilities are only available Suggested revision: only a limited number of facilities are available Why it matters: Only should directly modify a limited number to express the intended restriction.
- 3. Use natural noun Original: for their regular usage Suggested revision: for regular use Why it matters: For regular use is the standard concise expression.
- 4. Describe condition naturally Original: in improper condition for usage Suggested revision: in poor condition and unsuitable for regular use Why it matters: The revision uses natural collocations and makes the practical problem clear.
- 5. Identify target group Original: youngsters Suggested revision: young people my age Why it matters: This wording links the problem directly to the age group specified in the task.
- 6. Use sporting term Original: practices Suggested revision: training Why it matters: Training is the natural term for ongoing athletic preparation.
- 7. Correct tense sequence Original: Very recently, we understand Suggested revision: We recently learned Why it matters: The past form matches a piece of information acquired recently.
- 8. Name people clearly Original: upcoming generations Suggested revision: younger residents Why it matters: The original phrase is vague and unnatural for current local people.
- 9. Use natural purpose Original: for their better practices Suggested revision: to improve their training Why it matters: This infinitive phrase states the purpose clearly and uses an appropriate sporting term.
- 10. Choose correct noun Original: initiation Suggested revision: initiative Why it matters: Initiative means a planned action, whereas initiation does not fit this context.
- 11. Clarify the benefit Original: enhance their focus Suggested revision: support their training Why it matters: The revision states a concrete sporting benefit without a vague collocation.
- 12. Use specific outcome Original: great goals in their life Suggested revision: their sporting goals Why it matters: This concise phrase keeps the outcome relevant to sports facilities.
Suggested Rewrites
- council area
- a limited number of facilities are only available only a limited number of facilities are available
- for their regular usage for regular use
- in improper condition for usage in poor condition and unsuitable for regular use
- youngsters young people my age
- practices training
Why this response received Band 5.5
The letter is organised into recognizable stages and clearly conveys concern about inadequate local sports provision. However, it only partly fulfils the request because it focuses on financial support, equipment, renovation, and broadly targeted classes instead of clearly proposing new facilities for the writer's age group; the priority is to name the existing and requested facilities and explain their specific benefits.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The letter mentions limited, poorly maintained provision and its effects, but it does not clearly request specific facilities to be built and drifts beyond the stated age group.
Identify current facilities, request two or three concrete new facilities, and link each one directly to the needs of people your age.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing gives the letter a broadly logical sequence, although the shift from facilities to funding and then classes weakens the central progression.
Organise the body directly around the three bullet points and keep every supporting detail tied to sports facilities.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the message, but frequent awkward combinations such as more additional facilities, improper condition for usage, and this initiation reduce precision.
Use natural civic and sports collocations such as additional facilities, in poor condition, funding, and renovate the clubhouse.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex structures, but errors in sentence construction, word order, prepositions, and parallelism recur without usually obscuring meaning.
Edit each sentence for a complete grammatical frame, especially after request and in lists joining purchases, repairs, and activities.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You live in an area where some sports facilities are needed for people your age. Write a letter to local authorities. In your letter:
- Mention the existing facilities
- Ask for more facilities to be built
- Explain how these facilities will be useful for people your age.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.