Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. To what extent do you agree/disagree?
Sample Response
Some people hold a belief that schools should be a place where students study academic subjects to pass examinations rather than learn skills such as dressing and cookery. In my opinion, despite the significance of academic study and exams, students should also be taught fundamental life skills.
On the one hand, studying academic knowledge is vital for students in many ways. First, examination results are essential for students’ academic record. With good results, they will have an advantage in the national high school exams in which their academic performance after many years of study is considered. Second, academic subjects equip students with fundamental knowledge that will be used in tertiary education. For example, most undergraduates in Vietnam are supposed to pass subjects, such as Microeconomics and Advanced Mathematics, which are comprised of mathematical knowledge taught at high school. Without a deep understanding, students may fail the final exams and have to study these subjects again, which is time-consuming and costly.
However, there are several reasons why students still need to learn practical skills. For instance, when college students live far from family, life skills such as cooking will be helpful since students will be able to prepare healthy and affordable meals on their own instead of eating out at restaurants. Attending skill-building classes at school is also an effective way for students to unwind after many hours of studying academic subjects. Through a wide range of activities, students are able to relax and as a result perform better in exams.
In conclusion, I disagree that students should only study academic subjects because both academic knowledge and practical skills are equally important and should be taught at school.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use a direct verb Original: hold a belief Suggested revision: believe Why it matters: The direct verb is more concise and natural than the nominal phrase.
- 2. Match plural nouns Original: schools should be a place Suggested revision: schools should be places Why it matters: The plural subject schools requires the plural complement places in this general statement.
- 3. Choose precise wording Original: the significance of academic study and exams Suggested revision: the importance of academic study and examinations Why it matters: Importance is the more natural word for describing the value of study and examinations.
- 4. Fix the collocation Original: studying Suggested revision: acquiring Why it matters: Knowledge is normally acquired or gained rather than studied.
- 5. Use plural records Original: record Suggested revision: records Why it matters: The records belong individually to multiple students, so the count noun should be plural.
- 6. Remove unnecessary comma Original: subjects, such as Suggested revision: subjects such as Why it matters: The examples identify the relevant subjects, so a comma is not needed before such as.
- 7. Fix the relationship Original: which are comprised of Suggested revision: which involve Why it matters: Subjects involve knowledge; describing them as being comprised of knowledge is awkward and imprecise.
- 8. Clarify the reference Original: Without a deep understanding Suggested revision: Without a strong foundation in this knowledge Why it matters: The revision specifies what students need to understand and connects clearly to the preceding sentence.
- 9. Add the determiner Original: live far from family Suggested revision: live far from their families Why it matters: The possessive determiner is needed when referring to the students' own families.
- 10. Link to prior idea Original: Through a wide range of activities Suggested revision: By taking part in these activities Why it matters: This wording connects the result directly to the skill-building classes just mentioned.
- 11. Set off the linker Original: and as a result perform Suggested revision: and, as a result, perform Why it matters: The parenthetical linking phrase as a result should be set off with commas.
- 12. Make the claim precise Original: vital for students in many ways Suggested revision: important to students for several reasons Why it matters: The revision avoids the vague and slightly awkward phrase vital in many ways.
Suggested Rewrites
- hold a belief believe
- schools should be a place schools should be places
- the significance of academic study and exams the importance of academic study and examinations
- studying acquiring
- record records
- subjects, such as subjects such as
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response presents a clear position, develops both academic and practical education with relevant examples, and progresses smoothly from one side to the other. Its main limitation is that some support is slightly generic or imprecisely expressed, especially the discussion of examination advantage and mathematical knowledge. Develop the practical-skills case more fully and sharpen several collocations so the argument feels equally persuasive throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The question is fully addressed with a consistent position and relevant support for both academic and practical learning.
Extend the practical-skills argument beyond cooking and relaxation to give that side comparable depth.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is clearly organised, and ideas progress smoothly within and between appropriately focused paragraphs.
Vary the sequencing language slightly so the development feels less dependent on standard signposts.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of topic vocabulary, though several collocations are slightly awkward or imprecise.
Use more natural combinations when describing examination advantages, academic records, and mathematical foundations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are frequent and generally accurate, with only occasional minor control issues.
Check relative clauses and passive constructions carefully to keep references and relationships fully precise.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. To what extent do you agree/disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.