Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Life presents challenges, and individuals respond to difficulties in different ways. Some believe that accepting unfavourable circumstances, such as an unrewarding job or financial hardship, is the best approach, while others argue that people should actively work to improve their situation. This essay will discuss both perspectives before arguing that while improvement is ideal, some situations are beyond control, and accepting them can lead to greater peace of mind.
On the one hand, some argue that people should always strive for self-improvement rather than resigning to hardship. They believe that taking proactive steps can lead to a better quality of life. For instance, someone struggling financially can pursue additional qualifications or explore side businesses to increase their income. This approach not only improves material conditions but also fosters self-confidence and resilience.
On the other hand, those who advocate for acceptance of bad conditions believe that certain circumstances cannot be changed, and struggling against them only leads to frustration. Firstly, some people face unavoidable limitations, such as economic downturns, industry instability, or personal constraints. For instance, a worker in a declining industry may find it nearly impossible to switch careers due to age or lack of relevant skills. In such cases, acceptance helps individuals adapt and focus on making the best of their situation rather than dwelling on dissatisfaction. Moreover, constantly striving for change can cause emotional distress and burnout. Not everyone has the resources or opportunities to improve their condition, and repeated failure may lead to anxiety and disappointment.
To conclude, while both perspectives hold merit, I believe that accepting unchangeable hardships and focusing on happiness is the wiser approach. Some difficulties, such as chronic health issues or economic instability, are beyond an individual's control, and excessive striving may lead to unnecessary stress. Instead, finding contentment within one’s circumstances, practising gratitude, and focusing on emotional well-being can lead to a more fulfilling life.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Clarify the possessor Original: beyond control Suggested revision: beyond people's control Why it matters: Adding the possessor makes clear whose control is meant.
- 2. Complete the expression Original: resigning to hardship Suggested revision: resigning themselves to hardship Why it matters: Resign requires a reflexive object in this construction.
- 3. Use a stronger collocation Original: explore Suggested revision: start Why it matters: Start is the more direct verb for creating an additional business.
- 4. Use precise wording Original: acceptance of bad conditions Suggested revision: accepting adverse circumstances Why it matters: Adverse circumstances is more natural and precise than bad conditions.
- 5. Use a fitting connector Original: Firstly Suggested revision: For example Why it matters: For example suits the illustrative function without implying a later numbered point.
- 6. Clarify the relationship Original: industry instability Suggested revision: instability in their industry Why it matters: The expanded phrase makes the type of instability more explicit.
- 7. Improve parallel structure Original: due to age or lack of relevant skills Suggested revision: because of their age or a lack of relevant skills Why it matters: The possessive and article create a clearer parallel pair of limitations.
- 8. Specify the change Original: constantly striving for change Suggested revision: constantly striving to change their circumstances Why it matters: The revision identifies what people are trying to change.
- 9. Use consistent wording Original: condition Suggested revision: circumstances Why it matters: Circumstances is more natural for the combination of financial and personal situations discussed.
- 10. Refine the collocation Original: accepting unchangeable hardships and focusing on happiness Suggested revision: accepting unchangeable hardships and pursuing contentment Why it matters: Pursuing contentment expresses the intended response to hardship more precisely.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: Some difficulties, such as chronic health issues or economic instability, are beyond an individual's control, and excessive striving may lead to unnecessary stress. Suggested revision: Some difficulties, such as chronic health issues or economic instability, are beyond an individual's control. Excessive efforts to change them may lead to unnecessary stress. Why it matters: Dividing the two claims makes their relationship and reference clearer.
Suggested Rewrites
- beyond control beyond people's control
- resigning to hardship resigning themselves to hardship
- explore start
- acceptance of bad conditions accepting adverse circumstances
- Firstly For example
- industry instability instability in their industry
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay is strongest in its clear organisation and controlled language, with a consistent qualified view that acceptance is sensible when change is unrealistic. The main weakness is uneven development: the case for improvement receives only one brief example while acceptance receives several layers of support; expanding and critically weighing the first view before reaffirming the limits of change would produce a more fully balanced discussion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear qualified opinion are addressed, but the case for active improvement is less fully developed than acceptance.
Add another developed reason or example for active improvement, then weigh it explicitly against situations that genuinely cannot be changed.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses clearly from framing to opposing views and a conclusion, with cohesive devices used naturally.
Link the concluding preference more explicitly to the contrast established across the two body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Flexible, precise vocabulary conveys abstract ideas effectively, with only occasional awkward choices such as ‘resigning to hardship’.
Use fully idiomatic verb-preposition patterns when describing adaptation, resignation, and efforts to change.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex sentences are handled with strong control, and errors are rare and non-impeding.
Maintain this accuracy while making occasional clause-heavy sentences more concise.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.