Despite the increased access to education, a significant number of people cannot read or write. What are the disadvantages and what action should the government take?
Sample Response
The 21st century has witnessed the growth of universal education, yet many are suffering from illiteracy. This essay will discuss the disadvantages as well as how this grave issue can be tackled.
As a matter of course, not being able to read or write will limit one’s accessibility to general knowledge. Nowadays, written sources of information still account for the majority of knowledge. Take signposts, for example, the best option on the road for a driver to rely on to locate his whereabouts are road signs. However, with these being written signs, people who are unable to read have to find counterintuitive alternatives to look for directions. Moreover, illiteracy can put one at a great disadvantage at work where written messages play a crucial role in day-to-day communication. What most white-collar positions require these days is the ability to perform basic office tasks such as typing. This means that illiterate people would not be qualified for any of these jobs, and consequently, are tied to blue-collar, low-paid posts.
Nevertheless, there are a number of solutions that can be applied to alleviate this issue. First, ensuring universal education will play a significant role in the fight against illiteracy. Basic classes that teach reading and writing should be openly accessible for citizens of all ages, especially the disadvantaged or ethnic minority groups. Furthermore, infrastructure concerning education such as schools and roads needs to be constructed and improved in a way that people in all places can gain access to educational institutions easily. In Vietnam, many ethnic children have lost their right to learn due to poor road conditions; therefore, infrastructure should be one of the first areas that need fixing.
The lack of fundamental skills such as reading or writing certainly results in major setbacks in one’s knowledge and career path. Yet changes can be made to enable the illiterate to stand an equal chance in life through universal education and education-related infrastructure.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise wording Original: many are suffering from illiteracy Suggested revision: many people remain affected by illiteracy Why it matters: “Affected by illiteracy” describes the condition more naturally than “suffering from illiteracy.”
- 2. Use the correct noun Original: accessibility Suggested revision: access Why it matters: “Access” means the ability to obtain information, whereas “accessibility” describes how easy something is to use or reach.
- 3. Clarify the cause Original: with these being written signs Suggested revision: because these signs contain written information Why it matters: The revision states directly why the signs are inaccessible to people who cannot read.
- 4. Choose the intended meaning Original: counterintuitive alternatives Suggested revision: less direct alternatives Why it matters: “Counterintuitive” means contrary to expectation, which does not accurately describe alternative ways of finding directions.
- 5. Use a natural collocation Original: look for directions Suggested revision: find directions Why it matters: “Find directions” is the natural expression for obtaining navigational guidance.
- 6. Set off the clause Original: at work where written messages Suggested revision: at work, where written messages Why it matters: The comma marks “where written messages…” as a non-defining clause about the workplace context.
- 7. Fix the verb structure Original: , and consequently, are tied to Suggested revision: and may consequently be limited to Why it matters: The revision removes the unnecessary comma pattern and supplies a natural passive construction after the shared subject.
- 8. Use concise terminology Original: blue-collar, low-paid posts Suggested revision: low-paid manual jobs Why it matters: The revision expresses the intended employment category more directly and naturally.
- 9. Correct the preposition Original: for Suggested revision: to Why it matters: The adjective “accessible” takes the preposition “to” before the people who can use something.
- 10. Use the standard term Original: infrastructure concerning education Suggested revision: educational infrastructure Why it matters: “Educational infrastructure” is the concise conventional term for facilities and systems supporting education.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: Take signposts, for example, the best option on the road for a driver to rely on to locate his whereabouts are road signs. Suggested revision: Take road signs, for example: they are a driver’s most reliable means of determining their location. Why it matters: The original is a comma splice with subject–verb disagreement and unnecessary repetition of “signposts” and “road signs.”
Suggested Rewrites
- many are suffering from illiteracy many people remain affected by illiteracy
- accessibility access
- with these being written signs because these signs contain written information
- counterintuitive alternatives less direct alternatives
- look for directions find directions
- at work where written messages at work, where written messages
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its thorough, well-organised treatment of both the disadvantages of illiteracy and practical government action, with relevant examples supporting each point. The main limitation is occasional awkward or inaccurate phrasing and a few sentence-level slips. The highest-priority improvement is to refine collocations and proofread complex sentences so the otherwise precise argument is expressed with consistently natural control.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both parts of the task are fully addressed through developed disadvantages and relevant, practical government measures.
Make the proposed education programmes slightly more operational by explaining how governments could reach adults and remote groups.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically sequenced, clearly paragraphed, and cohesively links examples to each main idea.
Vary a few overt linking phrases so relationships between ideas remain smooth without sounding signposted.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide and generally precise, with effective topic-specific language despite a few unnatural collocations.
Replace awkward choices such as accessibility to general knowledge and counterintuitive alternatives with more idiomatic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex sentences is handled accurately overall, though a few agreement and sentence-boundary problems remain.
Proofread multi-clause examples carefully to correct slips such as a singular subject followed by are and comma-spliced clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Despite the increased access to education, a significant number of people cannot read or write. What are the disadvantages and what action should the government take?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.