Nowadays, education overseas has become more accessible and growing numbers of people send their offspring to study in other countries. However, this trend has its detractors. Discuss the advantages of this methods and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
One of the greatest advantages of studying overseas for young studentsadvantages for young students to study overseas is that they learn to be independent. Having to cook, clean, manage a budget, take care of themselves, pay bills and take important decisions, they become self-reliance and this instils good quality among them. Often, theyOften they have to work part-time to make ends meet, and this impresses upon them the importance of work and money management. Another important advantagefactor of studying in a foreign country is that these children will be exposed to different cultures and diverse ways of thinking. They will become more open-minded and tolerant and will likely becomeand are likely to become more adaptable individuals. Being exposedGetting exposes to different situations, they becomethey would become better decision-makers. One of the main motives for sending young people abroad to study is that it enhances their employment prospects. In my experience of living in foreign countries and speaking to various young peoplespeaking to various youths, it seems that a foreign education is regarded as desirableregarded as something desirable and helpful in securinggetting a decent job. A degree from Britain, for example, is seen as being of a higher standard than one from a developing country. Furthermore, living in a foreign country may lead to fluency in a second language, which is another advantageselling point for prospective employers. In addition, many companies are keen to recruit people with a global outlook. There are a few drawbacks, however. For instance, without parental supervision, the new found freedom that children experiencefreedom children experience may lead to harmful practices such as drug abuseabusing and a reckless lifestylerampant lifestyle. Reluctance or inability to reintegrate into their mother country is another one that is often considered as a negative effect of this trend. To sum up, it can be seen that the advantages of children studying abroadstudying abroad for children are more numerous than the disadvantages. Of course, a lotOf course a lot depends on the age of the child, but I believe that for most teenagers, it would befor most teenagers it would be a positive experience.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a clear positive opinion and develops three substantial advantages of overseas education: independence, cultural adaptability, and improved employment prospects. Its strongest feature is the specific explanation of how living abroad builds practical and professional skills, while the lack of paragraph breaks and several awkward grammatical forms reduce readability. The highest-priority improvement is to divide the advantages into focused paragraphs and edit inaccurate word forms and collocations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The advantages are directly and extensively developed and the writer's positive opinion is clear, with relevant drawbacks adding useful qualification.
Make the final judgment more analytical by weighing the strongest advantage against the stated risks and the student's age.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a logical sequence from independence to cultural growth, employability, drawbacks, and conclusion, but the response is presented as one long paragraph.
Separate each major advantage, the drawbacks, and the conclusion into distinct paragraphs with clear controlling ideas.
Lexical Resource
A broad range of vocabulary conveys practical, cultural, and employment benefits effectively, although several collocations and word forms are inaccurate.
Correct forms such as become self-reliant, get exposed, drug abuse, and reckless lifestyle while retaining the existing range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex structures with generally clear meaning, but recurring errors in participle clauses, agreement, articles, and word forms reduce accuracy.
Check that introductory participle clauses correctly describe the sentence subject and that adjective and noun forms match their grammatical roles.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, education overseas has become more accessible and growing numbers of people send their offspring to study in other countries. However, this trend has its detractors. Discuss the advantages of this methods and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.