In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?
Sample Response
The growing affordability of fast food is becoming prevalent in many parts of the world. I believe that the drawbacks of the ubiquity of convenience food outweigh the benefits it offers because although it proves to be an easily affordable food choice for lower-income families, these foods cause severe damage to health.
The main advantage of this phenomenon is accessibility and conveniencethe accessibility and convenience. Low-cost fast foodThe economical fast food is easily accessiblemakes it easily accessible to a large proportion of the populationa generous portion of the population, especially those with low incomesmeagre earnings. This, in fact, offers lower-income households an economy and convenient meal options, particularly those who lack access to costly food choices or face time constraints on home meal preparation. Single parents, for example, may find itmay seem it is highly convenient and economical to chooseresort to a quick, cost-effective fast-food meala prompt and cost-effective fast food meal for their familiesfamily after a hectic day.
One considerable drawback of the affordability and prevalence of convenience food is that it can negatively impact health. The widespread availability and low costThe prevalent and affordable nature of junk food tends to encourage individuals to consume it frequentlydrive individuals to frequent intake, thereby causing harm to healthdetrimental effects on health. This means that regular intake of fast food poses a serious risk of several diseasesa grave risk of various diseases, such as obesity, diabetes and other non-communicable diseases. A study conducted in India revealed that regularly consuming fast food could have a negative effect on insulin sensitivity, and could therefore poseand therefore poses an increased risk of type 2 diabetes. Fast food has also been linked tohas also been proven to be the underlying cause of various mental health conditionsmental diseases, including insomnia, depression, and anxiety.
To conclude, although it is beneficialit is a good thing that lower-income groups have easy access to affordable meal options, I think the diseases caused by consuming fast food frequently are considerably more harmful to individualsprove to be much more disadvantageous for individuals.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The essay gives a clear and consistent outweigh judgment, develops affordability and convenience as the main benefit, and supports the stronger health case with specific risks and an example. Its main limitation is frequent imprecision in otherwise varied vocabulary, with several phrases sounding forced, while the comparison could be made more explicit. Prioritise natural collocations and directly explain why severe long-term health costs outweigh short-term savings and convenience.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is clear throughout and both sides are relevantly developed, with particularly substantial support for the health disadvantage.
Make the weighing explicit by comparing the temporary financial benefit with the severity and duration of the health consequences.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and logical progression guide the reader from position to advantage, disadvantage, and conclusion with generally effective cohesion.
Reduce repetitive cause-and-effect transitions in the health paragraph and use one concise chain from consumption to disease.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates range and topic awareness, but recurring collocational errors such as economical fast food, generous portion, and prompt meal limit precision.
Use natural phrases such as inexpensive fast food, a large proportion of people, and a quick meal.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structures is mostly controlled, although article, word-form, agreement, and clause-pattern errors occur occasionally.
Revise sentences containing an economy and convenient meal and may seem it is, and keep verb forms parallel after could.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.