Some think that having ambition is a good quality. Is it important to be ambitious? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?
Sample Response
The theme of ambition, its significance, and implications have long been discussed in society. Despite a divergence of opinions surrounding this debate, I believe that this striving is crucial in certain respects, and that it is a positive characteristic which can propel growth and development in life.
Being ambitious is important for several reasons. Firstly, it produces the drive required to make breakthroughs in any competitive field. Though failure and ruin are plenty in business and science, most successful individuals did not simply attain their position without taking risks, which having ambition provides the proper mindset for. Furthermore, aspirations are necessary for fully realizing one’s potential. Matt Le Tissier, for example, was one of the best goalscorers of the English Premier League, but he was not a household name on the international stage. As legendary as his highlights were, he spent his entire professional career with Southampton, a middling football club. Le Tissier could have achieved worldwide fame had he been more ambitious and played for a top flight squad such as Real Madrid.
Despite some pitfalls, ambition should generally be regarded as positive. When it stops being a source of motivation and veers into obsession, it can become a detriment to one’s personal life and produce toxic attitudes. People who fail to check their ambitions, for instance, often engage in ruthless competition and may fracture their relationships using “the ends justify the means” argument as an excuse. If nurtured properly, however, this trait propels individuals towards achieving their desired goals, thereby making it integral to their personal development. With set ambitions, people tend to have a clear vision of their pathway to success, and as a result, they become more proactive and resilient. Occasionally, their productive actions are able to inspire others around them, so having ambitions may end up creating growth at the societal level.
In conclusion, being ambitious is essential for people who look to accomplish things in life. Though it may be seen as negative by some, balancing aspiration with integrity can make it into a constructive driving force, therefore ensuring its positivity.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct the preposition Original: of Suggested revision: in Why it matters: 'In' is the appropriate preposition for participation and achievement within a league.
- 2. Use concise form Original: become a detriment Suggested revision: become detrimental Why it matters: The adjective expresses the same meaning more directly and naturally.
- 3. Place article correctly Original: “the ends justify the means” argument Suggested revision: the “ends justify the means” argument Why it matters: The definite article belongs before the quoted phrase that modifies 'argument'.
- 4. Improve verb pattern Original: propels individuals towards achieving Suggested revision: drives individuals toward Why it matters: This verb pattern connects naturally to the following noun phrase 'their desired goals'.
- 5. Clarify pronoun reference Original: it Suggested revision: ambition Why it matters: Repeating the key noun removes ambiguity about what is integral to personal development.
- 6. Use natural collocation Original: set Suggested revision: clear Why it matters: 'Clear ambitions' is a more natural expression for well-defined aims.
- 7. Make wording concise Original: are able to inspire Suggested revision: can inspire Why it matters: The modal verb conveys ability more concisely.
- 8. Choose precise wording Original: creating growth at the societal level Suggested revision: promoting progress at the societal level Why it matters: 'Promoting progress' is a more natural collocation for wider social improvement.
- 9. Remove unnecessary preposition Original: make it into a constructive driving force Suggested revision: make it a constructive driving force Why it matters: The construction 'make something a force' does not require 'into'.
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: Though failure and ruin are plenty in business and science, most successful individuals did not simply attain their position without taking risks, which having ambition provides the proper mindset for. Suggested revision: Although failure and ruin are common in business and science, most successful individuals have attained their positions by taking risks, for which ambition provides the proper mindset. Why it matters: This rewrite corrects the unnatural quantifier, number agreement, tense, and awkward final relative clause while preserving the claim.
Suggested Rewrites
- of in
- become a detriment become detrimental
- “the ends justify the means” argument the “ends justify the means” argument
- propels individuals towards achieving drives individuals toward
- it ambition
- set clear
Why this response received Band 8.0
This response is strongest in its clear position and substantial development of both the importance and the positive character of ambition, including a useful acknowledgment of its risks. The main limitation is uneven precision in several collocations and sentence constructions, which occasionally makes otherwise sophisticated ideas sound strained; the highest-priority improvement is to simplify those sentences and choose more idiomatic phrasing, especially around the sporting example and the final conclusion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered directly through a consistent positive position, developed reasons, and relevant consideration of ambition's potential harms.
Strengthen the argument by replacing the speculative football outcome with evidence that more directly demonstrates how ambition enables achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a clear progression from importance to evaluation, and the ideas within each paragraph are generally well connected.
Tighten the longer body paragraphs by giving each supporting example a more explicit link back to the paragraph's central claim.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and ambitious, but several combinations, including failure and ruin are plenty and set ambitions, are not fully natural.
Prioritise idiomatic collocations over elevated wording, using phrases such as failure is common and clearly defined ambitions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex forms is used successfully, although a few clauses are awkwardly constructed and reduce fluency.
Recast strained structures such as which having ambition provides the proper mindset for into shorter, grammatically direct sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some think that having ambition is a good quality. Is it important to be ambitious? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.