Some people enjoy change and look forward to new experiences. Others like their lives to remain the same and do not like any changes. Different people have different approaches to life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
On the one hand, some people love excitement and new adventures in life to keep happening in their life constantly. Likewise, they are the ones who are keen on discovering more about themselves, and trying out new things that they haven’t done before. Nowadays, from old practices to technology, every single thing is constantly changing. As a result of this, staying up to date is crucial for everyone. Regarding businessmen, for instance, they keep adjusting their ways to meet different sets of customers whenever they want to. But, if they are not open to variety, and just want to stick to one set of people, their businesses can easily fail. Hence, staying open to change usually ends up having more dynamic experiences.
On the contrary, there are people who prefer keeping things and their lives as they are and enjoying their routine without encouraging a change. For some, especially those who’ve succeeded and are a bit older, maintaining a steady business and secure jobs is their goal, for example. Moreover, they might rather want a reliable income and they would get to spend more time with family, especially as they grow older. Thus, those who’ve set up a good money flow might not want big changes in their current life in order to keep looking after their loved ones.
To conclude, change is subjective to an individual’s personal preference. For young people change might sound interesting and they might be open to exploring new stuff consistently whereas, people who have settled down may feel their routine to be safe and secure. However, in my opinion, change is a good thing be it personally or professionally.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use additive link Original: Likewise Suggested revision: In addition Why it matters: The sentence adds another characteristic rather than making a close comparison.
- 2. Remove unnecessary comma Original: themselves, and trying Suggested revision: themselves and trying Why it matters: The comma incorrectly separates two coordinated verb phrases.
- 3. Use inclusive wording Original: Regarding businessmen Suggested revision: For business owners Why it matters: ‘Business owners’ is more precise and inclusive in this context.
- 4. Use precise collocation Original: adjusting their ways Suggested revision: adapting their practices Why it matters: This collocation states the business response more precisely.
- 5. Clarify customer groups Original: different sets of customers Suggested revision: different customer groups Why it matters: The revision is more concise and uses the standard business term.
- 6. Clarify timing Original: whenever they want to Suggested revision: as needed Why it matters: The revision conveys practical necessity rather than personal whim.
- 7. Correct transition punctuation Original: But Suggested revision: However Why it matters: ‘However’ works naturally as a sentence adverb followed by a comma.
- 8. Use consistent term Original: variety Suggested revision: change Why it matters: ‘Change’ matches the essay topic and is more precise than ‘variety’.
- 9. Specify the group Original: one set of people Suggested revision: one customer group Why it matters: The revision identifies the relevant group and avoids vague wording.
- 10. Fix verb pattern Original: ends up having Suggested revision: leads to Why it matters: The original structure incorrectly makes openness possess experiences.
- 11. Use balanced contrast Original: On the contrary Suggested revision: By contrast Why it matters: The paragraph presents an alternative preference rather than directly disproving the previous view.
- 12. Use natural collocation Original: without encouraging a change Suggested revision: without embracing change Why it matters: People more naturally ‘embrace’ change than ‘encourage’ a change in this context.
Suggested Rewrites
- Likewise In addition
- themselves, and trying themselves and trying
- Regarding businessmen For business owners
- adjusting their ways adapting their practices
- different sets of customers different customer groups
- whenever they want to as needed
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response clearly distinguishes the two attitudes and uses relevant examples, especially the contrast between commercial adaptability and the security valued by settled workers. Its main limitation is that the writer’s own view appears only briefly at the end and is not developed through the discussion. Establish the opinion earlier and support it with a focused reason showing why embracing change is preferable despite the benefits of stability.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are discussed with relevant reasons and examples, but the writer’s own opinion is stated only briefly and lacks development.
Introduce a clear position near the beginning and explain why its advantages outweigh the appeal of stability.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has clear overall progression and sensible paragraphing, although some linking is mechanical and the opening viewpoint begins abruptly.
Add a concise introduction and use more natural transitions within paragraphs instead of relying on set contrast markers.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary shows adequate range for discussing change and security, but several expressions are repetitive, informal, or imprecise.
Replace awkward phrases such as good money flow and new stuff with precise, natural academic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates meaning clearly, though recurring awkward constructions and punctuation errors reduce control.
Review clause boundaries and comparative structures, especially sentences using whereas, rather, and multiple coordinated ideas.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people enjoy change and look forward to new experiences. Others like their lives to remain the same and do not like any changes. Different people have different approaches to life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.