The camera has changed the way we look at the world and the way that we celebrate special occasions. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Sample Response
The invention of the camera was one of the greatest inventionsfindings of all time. For the last two decades, photos and videos have become an integral part of Deletethe human culture. ClearlyNeedless to say, the camera has changed the way people celebrate andchanged the way of celebration and the way an ordinary person sees the worldthe perception of a normal person. Nowadays, thereNowadays there is rarely any occasion which is not capturedis not being captured by a camera or video recorder. Also, the way important events are broadcastthe ways important events are being telecasted have changed considerablychanged a lot.
Firstly, the camera has enabled us to preserve records of memorable eventsopened up avenues for keeping our memorable events intact throughout our lifetimesour life span. These still images and videos captured by the camera can later be used to relivecherish those moments of happiness. Take the first rice ceremony of a newly born child, for instance. When this child grows up, he can feel their parents’ feelingshis parent's exact feeling, through the video captured at the time of the event. Thus, it is quite evident that the camera has changed the way we celebrate memorable occasionsthe way of celebration of our memorable occasions.
Moreover, the camera has also changed the way we look at the world. For example, in the non-camera era, it was impossible for peopleany individual to view the live broadcasttelecast of the very important "rail budget" being presented in parliamentbeing organised at the parliament. The introduction of the camera has made this possible. Now sitting at any corner of the world, a person can watch the live streaming of any important event being organised somewhere else. Looking at this illustration, it can be easily seen how
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response clearly agrees with the statement and addresses both celebration and worldwide perception through relevant examples of preserving family memories and viewing distant events. Its central limitation is that it stops mid-sentence, leaving the second idea unfinished and providing no conclusion, while also falling just below the required length; the highest-priority improvement is to complete the argument and add a concise synthesis of both effects.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position and two relevant dimensions of the task are present, but the second main idea is incomplete and the response lacks a conclusion, with a slight length shortfall.
Finish explaining how live images shape global understanding, then add a conclusion that directly links cameras to both perception and celebration.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and two body paragraphs follow a logical plan, but progression breaks off abruptly before the second paragraph is completed or the essay is concluded.
Complete the final body paragraph and use a short concluding paragraph to close the argument rather than ending inside a sentence.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is reasonably varied and generally clear, though collocations such as "greatest findings," "human culture," and "changed the way of celebration" are awkward.
Use natural alternatives such as "greatest inventions," "modern culture," and "changed how people celebrate special occasions."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses a mix of sentence structures with generally clear meaning, but article, possessive, and passive-form errors recur, and the final sentence is incomplete.
Correct forms such as "their parents' feelings" and "events held in parliament," and ensure every sentence is grammatically complete.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The camera has changed the way we look at the world and the way that we celebrate special occasions. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.