Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think the cheap air flight should be banned because it pollutes the air and brings many other problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
In this era of technological advancements and globalisation, cheap air flight is greatly controversial as some regards it is advantageous for tourism and flexible journey, others, on the contrary, consider it as a threat to the environment. In this essay, I will examine both views and finally express my opinion on that.
On one hand, cheap air travel has tremendously helped the tourism industry all over the world to flourish. Due to the economic air flights, many middle-class people now travel to other countries to enjoy their holidays, visit relatives and do business tours. Compared to the previous generations, modern people can save a great deal of time only because of the frequent and cheaper air travels. This has significantly improved people’s freedom to visit different places. On top of that, the tourism industry has been able to attract global tourists owing to the fact that people can afford the air travel these days.
On the contrary, many people consider the cheap and frequent air travel a key factor for the environmental damages and hence they opine that these sorts of economic flyings should be banned. Their main concern is the number of aeroplanes flying every day to different destinations and the amount of pollution they are causing to the environment. From the environmental point of view, a single flight emits a huge amount of Carbon dioxide which is the main reason for the greenhouse effect. No doubt the economy flights give some freedom and luxury to the passengers, but the negative impacts these cheap flights have are colossal.
Considering both viewpoints and arguments, I would like to state that, in this modern era we cannot ban cheap air flight as it has already become the part of global tourism, trade and economy. However, we must continue research to find an alternative fuel for the aeroplanes to reduce the CO 2 emission from each flight. Scientific research brings us wonderful results and countries should work together to find out an effective solution to this problem.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove vague reference Original: opinion on that Suggested revision: opinion Why it matters: The prepositional phrase is unnecessary because the topic of the opinion is already clear.
- 2. Complete paired connector Original: On one hand Suggested revision: On the one hand Why it matters: The fixed expression requires the before one hand.
- 3. Use natural flight term Original: economic air flights Suggested revision: affordable flights Why it matters: Economic does not mean inexpensive in this noun phrase, while affordable expresses the intended idea.
- 4. Use correct collocation Original: do business tours Suggested revision: travel for business Why it matters: Travel for business is the natural expression for making work-related trips.
- 5. Clarify comparison Original: Compared to the previous generations Suggested revision: Compared with previous generations Why it matters: The revision compares modern people directly with earlier generations and removes the unnecessary article.
- 6. Use uncountable noun Original: travels Suggested revision: travel Why it matters: Air travel is uncountable when referring generally to this mode of transport.
- 7. Use precise term Original: global Suggested revision: international Why it matters: International tourists more clearly refers to visitors travelling between countries.
- 8. Remove unnecessary article Original: afford the air travel these days Suggested revision: afford air travel these days Why it matters: Air travel is an uncountable general activity and does not take the here.
- 9. Use concise collocation Original: pollution they are causing to the environment Suggested revision: pollution they cause Why it matters: Cause pollution already identifies the environmental harm, so the original prepositional phrase is redundant and awkward.
- 10. Use concise framing Original: From the environmental point of view Suggested revision: From an environmental perspective Why it matters: The revision is a more concise academic expression.
- 11. Avoid absolute causal claim Original: the main reason for the greenhouse effect Suggested revision: a major cause of the greenhouse effect Why it matters: The revised phrase preserves the causal point without presenting one factor as the sole reason.
- 12. Use correct flight term Original: economy flights Suggested revision: low-cost flights Why it matters: Economy describes a travel class, whereas low-cost identifies inexpensive flights.
Suggested Rewrites
- opinion on that opinion
- On one hand On the one hand
- economic air flights affordable flights
- do business tours travel for business
- Compared to the previous generations Compared with previous generations
- travels travel
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response presents a clear position, covers both perspectives, and develops the benefits of affordable flying and its environmental cost in a logical structure. Its main limitation is the persistent use of awkward or inaccurate collocations and several grammatical slips, which reduce precision despite clear meaning. The highest-priority improvement is to use natural aviation-related vocabulary and proofread agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and a clear, relevant opinion is maintained, with generally developed support for the main ideas.
Develop the case for restricting cheap flights beyond pollution alone and support the proposed alternative-fuel solution more specifically.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph response progresses logically, and its main points are easy to follow despite some formulaic linking.
Use a wider range of subtler transitions and strengthen the connection between the environmental argument and the final solution.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range to discuss tourism, mobility, emissions, and policy, but recurring unnatural collocations reduce precision.
Replace phrases such as economic flyings and air travels with natural terms such as low-cost flights and air travel.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures is attempted successfully, although agreement, article, punctuation, and clause-control errors recur.
Proofread each complex sentence for subject-verb agreement, article use, and complete clause boundaries before finalising the response.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think the cheap air flight should be banned because it pollutes the air and brings many other problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.