Mobile phones and the Internet have made it easier to stay in contact with other people. However, as a lot of time is spent using telephones and computers, there is less face-to-face contact and direct communication. Is the growing use of communications technology a positive or a negative development for society?
Sample Response
In recent yearsdays, mobile phoneshandphones and the Internet have become a necessity for many individualsthe necessity of many individuals. It is said that spending time playing these devices or surfing the Internet can be some unique recreational activities. This essay is going to examine the effects of communication technology on societyimpacts of the communications technology to the community. Undoubtedly, mobile gadgets and the Internet can bring us great convenience. ThisIt is because, with portable and user-friendly mobile phonesa portable and user-friendly hand phones, we can contact each other at any time regardless of locationregardless of the locations. Besides, the Internet also makesmade it easier for us to be informed of the latest and most stunning news without having to read the daily newspaper. Furthermore, with the widespread usage of the Internet, it takes us only a few moments before our problems are solved online as solutions are demanded from a staggering amount of the Internet users around the globe. However, in my opinion, the disadvantages of using the latest communication technologyusing latest communications technology definitely outweigh the advantages. It is generally reported that people tendsomeone tends to become shy and socially withdrawnseriously unsociable due to the long-term useusage of cyber communications tools. As people increasingly use the newest technologyBeing influenced by the newest technology, the importance of direct communication is gradually being neglectedbeing taken for granted. However, it is evident that basic communication skillsthe basic communication skills are essential to individuals, especiallyindividuals especially those who work in societyin the society. Without these skills, one may be left behind and thus lose the ability to be independent. In a nutshell, making use of the most up-to-date technology is pleasurable. However, in order to achieve the best resultsfor the best result to be expected, restrictions should be set in advance to avoid overuse or abuseover-usage or abuses of the technology.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response considers both benefits and drawbacks and gives a definite judgment that the social disadvantages outweigh the convenience of communication technology. Its main limitation is that several claims are vague or weakly connected, while the one-paragraph structure and frequent awkward expressions make the reasoning less persuasive. The highest-priority improvement is to develop one clear social benefit and one clear harm with specific examples, then explain why the harm carries greater weight.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear negative judgment is supported by relevant benefits and harms, but development is uneven and some consequences are asserted without sufficient explanation.
Use a concrete example to show how excessive online communication weakens face-to-face ability and explain why this outweighs convenience.
Coherence and Cohesion
The movement from advantages to disadvantages and a conclusion is discernible, but the single paragraph and repeated transitional markers limit clear progression.
Separate the introduction, benefits, harms, and conclusion, with one central claim developed in each body paragraph.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for technology and social interaction, but many collocations, word choices, and plural forms are inaccurate or unnatural.
Use precise phrases such as 'mobile phones', 'communication technology', 'online users', 'face-to-face skills', and 'excessive use'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, though recurring errors with articles, agreement, prepositions, and passive constructions reduce control.
Revise forms such as 'mobile phones are necessities', 'the impact on society', and 'restrictions should be introduced to prevent overuse'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Mobile phones and the Internet have made it easier to stay in contact with other people. However, as a lot of time is spent using telephones and computers, there is less face-to-face contact and direct communication. Is the growing use of communications technology a positive or a negative development for society?
Your response
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