Many people spend a lot of time using communication technology. What are the reasons for this? What is the impact of it on the relationships with their families and other people?
Sample Response
Communication is the art of conveying ideasexpressions, emotions and feelings between individuals. As humanity advancesAs the human steps on the path to transcendence, technologythe high-tech tries to affect every facet of lifeinterfere in every facet of life and make its changes easier to managefacilitate the vicissitudes of it. However, the actual effectsreal impacts of novel technologies remain the subject of ongoing debateare a perennial debate.
First, the invention of the telegraph made our vastinfinite world really small. So, delivering messages faster was the first milestone in communication technologyfirst stepping stone of communication technology. Second, with the use of landline phones and, later, cell phonesutilising ordinary phones and some years later by cell phones, lonelinessthe word of loneliness was eliminated from societythe dictionary of a society. Third, the internet, whichthe internet which has the most striking impact on our lives, makesour life makes it possible to transform a cell phone into a bank, library or a conference room. Thus, being stocked in traffic jams or breathing polluted air is not a matter due to privileges of novel technologies.
On the other hand, psychologists consider modern people an indolent species. Nowadays, we prefer using our phones instead of taking a walk to see a friend. Also, the artificial intelligence and ambience dilute the role of emotion in interacting. The amazing gadgets and engaging digital communicationfascinating communication can lead us to forget how to like and dislike. Hence, it can put us in a prison that we make and erect around ourselvesthe prison which we made and erect around us.
To sum up, although the modern technology can make far distances shorter or carry out our monotonous works faster, but we should not lose the sight of the fact that it can never transfer our feeling and emotions. Thus, a middle ground should be taken for these two approaches.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response uses a clear paragraph structure and shows an ambitious range of language while explaining some conveniences of communication technology and its isolating effects. However, the reasons people spend so much time with it are addressed only indirectly, and several ideas are abstract or insufficiently developed. Prioritise a direct explanation of user motivations, then support each claimed effect on relationships with a concrete, clearly expressed example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions receive some attention, but the reasons for extensive use are mostly implied through a history of technological convenience and the relationship effects remain broadly developed.
State two direct reasons for heavy use and explain a specific consequence for family or social relationships after each one.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph response progresses from background to benefits, drawbacks, and a conclusion, although numbered transitions and some unclear links make the progression mechanical.
Organise each body paragraph around one controlling idea and use logical connections that explicitly show cause and effect.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is varied and ambitious, but frequent imprecise choices and awkward collocations sometimes obscure otherwise understandable ideas.
Prefer accurate, natural combinations such as being stuck in traffic and emotional connection rather than forcing unusual abstract expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures is attempted, but recurring article, agreement, clause, and sentence-construction errors reduce control while meaning generally remains clear.
Edit complex sentences for complete clause structure and remove double-linking patterns such as although followed by but.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many people spend a lot of time using communication technology. What are the reasons for this? What is the impact of it on the relationships with their families and other people?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.