In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?
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Sample Response
It is widely acknowledged thatThere is a situation that the number of animals and plants is dropping in many countries. Many people have divergent perspectivesdifferent kinds of views about this. From my perspective, the construction and expansion of cities areis the main reason. People can solve this through better city planning to provide more space for them to live in.
To begin with, many countries in the world are going to develop themselves, such as modernisationmodernizasion and urbanization. In both situations, countries will need more and more placesplace to build tallhigh buildings or some other facilities. For example, many cities built before are not fit their development nowadays, they want to occupy more space to build things inby many ways, such as deforesting and occupying habitats. As a result, the more cities occupy, the less space for animals and plants to live in, which results in the decrease of the number of animals and plants.
Nevertheless, we can solve this problem by better city planning. Although many cities need more space to build, they can make good use of their existing spacespace nowadays to relieve that problem, which prevents them from destroyingwhich avoids them decreasing animal and plant habitatsanimals and plants habitats. A prime example is that cities in Singapore, they often build their home or workplace with gardens, which provide an environment for small animals and plants to live in. Moreover, they also construct their cities with a better planning, such as makingmake use of every corner of their house or streets. As a result, they can not only decrease their demand to occupy more habitats, but they can also providethey also can provide more gardens for animals and plants.
In conclusion, the main reason for the decrease of the number of animals and plantsthe figure for animals and plants is the constructionconsatruction and expansion of cities, which can be solved by better city planningplaning. Not only doesdose it provide more gardens for them to live in, but it also reducesdeclines cities' demand to get more space, which can increase the number of animals and plants greatly.
Why this response received Band 6.5
文章切合题意，针对动植物数量减少的原因和解决办法给出了明确的观点和合理的事例支持。结构框架清晰且段落分明，但在词汇拼写准确度与部分复杂句型的语法控制上仍有提升空间。建议强化高级词汇的精准度，并注意倒装句和动词搭配等语法细节。
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
任务回应
文章全面回答了产生问题的原因和应对措施，并结合具体例子展开了充分的阐述。
可以尝试探讨城市扩张之外的其他因素（如污染或气候变化），使论据更加多维丰富。
连贯与衔接
段落划分合理，逻辑推进清晰，衔接词的使用有效地引导了文章流向。
注意避免部分衔接短语的机械重复，使用更自然多样化的过渡方式。
词汇资源
掌握了与话题相关的基础词汇和短语，但存在少许拼写错误与不地道的表达。
积累并准确拼写高频学术词汇，如 construction 和 planning，同时替换如 the figure for animals 等不当表达。
语法多样性与准确性
展现了使用复杂句和倒装句的意识，但部分句式存在语法小错误。
加强对特殊句型（如 not only ... but also 的倒装拼写 dose -> does）和动词搭配的精准控制。