More people are using mobile phones and computers to communicate. Therefore people are losing the ability to communicate with each other face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
There are an increasing number of people who rely on smartphones and computers to interact with each other. l agree that this can have a damaging effect on their ability to handle face-to-face communication, although some skills may not be affected.
Mobile phone and computer users are possibly not able to detect the emotions of other people in a conversation and show empathy. When talking to others on the phone or computer, they rely on verbal messages or emoji, rather than paying attention to the moods of other people, which can be deduced by analysing facial expressions, gestures, tones and body language in face-to-face communication. Understanding the emotions of other people is important because it can affect whether we can interpret all messages correctly, conduct a constructive conversation and even develop a relationship with others.
Another reason is that heavy users of electronic devices may not show patience or skills in a long, face-to-face conversation. They tend to play games, read articles, browse websites or engage in any other online activity, while talking to others online or making phone calls. In contrast, face-to-face communication with others is less interesting and fails to hold their attention; as a consequence, they may not exhibit the ability to listen carefully to others, show politeness and manage temper when they do not appreciate the topic or opinions of others.
On the other hand, electronic means of communication may not pose a threat to all communication skills, because people prefer face-to-face communication on many occasions. They intend to hold face-to-face group meetings, in which they can communicate with multiple participants effectively by seeing one another's faces and emotions directly. In face-to-face communication, they can decide when to express their personal views or pause to listen, by observing the non-verbal cues of other speakers. Meanwhile, communication is an integral part of special experiences, such as attending friends' gatherings or birthday parties of family members, in which they can convey feelings by words and build a bond with others
In conclusion, I would argue that communication technology can erode some of our communication skills, although face-to-face communication plays an important role in some cases.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct pronoun Original: l Suggested revision: I Why it matters: The first-person pronoun must be written with a capital I rather than a lowercase l.
- 2. Use plural noun Original: emoji Suggested revision: emojis Why it matters: The general reference to multiple message types requires the plural form emojis.
- 3. Use natural collocation Original: tones Suggested revision: tone Why it matters: Tone is normally used as an uncountable feature of speech in this list.
- 4. Keep pronouns consistent Original: whether we can interpret all messages correctly Suggested revision: whether people can interpret messages correctly Why it matters: The revision avoids shifting from the paragraph's third-person focus to we.
- 5. Remove unnecessary comma Original: activity, while talking Suggested revision: activity while talking Why it matters: The while-clause is integral to the meaning and should not be separated by a comma.
- 6. Use natural phrase Original: manage temper Suggested revision: control their temper Why it matters: Control one's temper is the standard expression and also supplies the required determiner.
- 7. Clarify context Original: on many occasions Suggested revision: in many situations Why it matters: Situations describes the contexts in which a communication mode is preferred more precisely.
- 8. Clarify visible evidence Original: faces and emotions directly Suggested revision: facial expressions directly Why it matters: Emotions cannot be seen directly, whereas facial expressions can be observed.
- 9. Remove unnecessary comma Original: listen, by observing Suggested revision: listen by observing Why it matters: The by-phrase directly explains how the decision is made and should not be separated by a comma.
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: Another reason is that heavy users of electronic devices may not show patience or skills in a long, face-to-face conversation. Suggested revision: Another reason is that heavy users of electronic devices may lack the patience or skills needed for a long face-to-face conversation. Why it matters: Lack the patience or skills needed is the natural construction for describing an absence of these abilities.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: Meanwhile, communication is an integral part of special experiences, such as attending friends' gatherings or birthday parties of family members, in which they can convey feelings by words and build a bond with others Suggested revision: Meanwhile, communication is integral to social occasions such as friends' gatherings or family birthday parties, where people can express feelings through words and build bonds with others. Why it matters: The revision resolves the unclear relative clause and improves the sentence's cohesion and phrasing.
Suggested Rewrites
- l I
- emoji emojis
- tones tone
- whether we can interpret all messages correctly whether people can interpret messages correctly
- activity, while talking activity while talking
- manage temper control their temper
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response offers a clear, suitably qualified position and develops its central ideas through detailed explanations of empathy, attention, and non-verbal cues. The main limitation is that the counterpoint sometimes describes occasions when people communicate face to face without fully proving that particular skills remain unaffected. The highest-priority improvement is to connect each example more explicitly to the precise degree of agreement stated in the thesis.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the proposition directly, maintains a clear qualified position, and develops both the damaging effects and the stated limitation substantially.
Explain more explicitly how continued face-to-face interaction preserves specific skills, rather than mainly showing that such interaction still occurs.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically organised, with focused paragraphs and clear progression from two supporting reasons to a relevant qualification.
Sharpen the transition into the counterargument by stating exactly how it limits the preceding claim before presenting examples.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, although several collocations such as show patience or skills and manage temper are slightly unnatural.
Use more idiomatic collocations, for example sustain attention, exercise patience, and control their temper, to improve precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a wide variety of complex structures with strong control, while only isolated slips and punctuation omissions are evident.
Proofread for small surface errors, particularly the initial letter typo and the missing full stop at the end of the fourth paragraph.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
More people are using mobile phones and computers to communicate. Therefore people are losing the ability to communicate with each other face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.