Some people focus on news in their own country, while others think it is more important to be aware of international news. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Many readers now feel it is more important to stay informed concerning international news items, rather than local ones. In my opinion, though international news can be interesting, local stories contain greater relevance and are therefore more important.
Consumers of international news point out its entertainment value. The majority of people reading news from other countries recognize it has essentially no impact on their own life. However, for many articles from abroad also tend to hold greater appeal. An individual in the United Kingdom, for example, might become bored of local politics and repetitive, provincial stories. There is likely to be more excitement gained in reading about global conflicts, trade disputes, foreign elections, political unrest and environmental catastrophes in distant nations. The reader may not be aware of their own intentions, but these stories are primarily a way to pass the time and be entertained.
However, the entertainment value of international news is less important than relevant local reporting. For example, local news has become essential reading during the recent Covid-19 pandemic. Individuals have little choice but to read articles about the particular strain in their nation, the number of active cases, and the restrictions being urged or mandated by public authorities. If an individual is unaware of such news, they may violate a rule and put themselves and others at risk. The value of local news applies to less pressing emergency situations as well and may include stories about local elections, corruption in politics, crime rates, and various other stories of interest.
In conclusion, despite the value of international news as a source of entertainment, local news should be prioritized given its actual significance. Individuals should strive to ignore as much news as possible and only stay informed about pertinent issues.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the natural preposition Original: concerning Suggested revision: about Why it matters: 'Informed about' is the standard collocation for a news topic.
- 2. Remove the comparison comma Original: international news items, rather than local ones Suggested revision: international news items rather than local ones Why it matters: The comma unnecessarily separates the compared alternatives.
- 3. Use an idiomatic phrase Original: contain greater relevance Suggested revision: are more relevant Why it matters: 'Are more relevant' expresses the comparison naturally and directly.
- 4. Add the reporting linker Original: recognize it has Suggested revision: recognize that it has Why it matters: 'That' clearly introduces the clause functioning as the object of 'recognize'.
- 5. Match the plural referent Original: life Suggested revision: lives Why it matters: The plural group 'people' requires the plural noun 'lives'.
- 6. Use a formal collocation Original: of Suggested revision: with Why it matters: 'Bored with' is the more conventional choice in formal written English.
- 7. Simplify the passive phrase Original: more excitement gained in reading Suggested revision: more excitement in reading Why it matters: Removing the unnecessary participle makes the construction grammatical and concise.
- 8. Correct the verb choice Original: urged Suggested revision: recommended Why it matters: Authorities can recommend or mandate restrictions, while 'urge restrictions' is awkward here.
- 9. Avoid a contradictory phrase Original: less pressing emergency situations Suggested revision: less urgent situations Why it matters: Calling a situation both less pressing and an emergency creates an internal contradiction.
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: However, for many articles from abroad also tend to hold greater appeal. Suggested revision: However, for many readers, articles from abroad also tend to hold greater appeal. Why it matters: The original opening lacks the noun that 'for many' modifies and therefore breaks the sentence structure.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: The reader may not be aware of their own intentions, but these stories are primarily a way to pass the time and be entertained. Suggested revision: Readers may not recognize their own motives, but they primarily use these stories to pass the time and be entertained. Why it matters: This version clarifies whose motive is meant and gives the second clause a human subject.
Suggested Rewrites
- concerning about
- international news items, rather than local ones international news items rather than local ones
- contain greater relevance are more relevant
- recognize it has recognize that it has
- life lives
- of with
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongly organised, maintains a clear preference for local news, and uses varied, precise language to develop both perspectives. Its main limitation is that the international-news case is reduced largely to entertainment, making that side less fully explored, and the final recommendation to ignore most news is insufficiently prepared. The highest-priority improvement is to develop a broader rationale for international awareness and ensure the conclusion follows directly from the argument.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and the writer's preference is clear, but the case for international news is somewhat narrow and the final recommendation is underdeveloped.
Explore a substantive benefit of international awareness and justify any concluding recommendation through the preceding discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are sequenced clearly, paragraphs have distinct purposes, and cohesive devices guide the reader smoothly through the comparison.
Refine the transition within the international-news paragraph so the move from limited personal impact to greater appeal is completely seamless.
Lexical Resource
A wide, precise vocabulary conveys nuanced distinctions effectively, including language about relevance, public restrictions, politics, and global events.
Maintain this range while checking the naturalness of occasional phrases such as 'greater relevance' and 'less pressing emergency situations'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a wide range of complex structures with strong control, and the few slips do not affect communication.
Eliminate isolated agreement and sentence-structure lapses, particularly in 'their own life' and 'However, for many articles...'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people focus on news in their own country, while others think it is more important to be aware of international news. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.