Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. To what extent do you agree with this view? What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life?
Sample Response
It is true that a large number of people decide to take part in a career and earn money while the intention develops from the early stages of their life. As a result, they are happy with their working life. The view may vary but I completely agree withto this. Frequently, the dream of taking up a career begins early in lifein early part of life. When children are at schoolkids are in schools, they writecompose essays on ‘Aim in Life’ where they describe what they intend to do in adulthoodmention about intentions to do in their adulthood. Consequently, they try to enter the career path they have long desiredget into the track they cherished and most of them securewin the career and progress professionallygrow well in all terms. So, when they are on their desired career pathin desired track, they are satisfied with their working life. An early career startThe early career gives enough time for thinking or even switching careerscareer. People who start working at an early stage have better skills and better control of their professional life. By contrastIn opposite, in my life, I have met some people who are unhappy with their career pathsmet with some unhappy people with their career path. They blame misfortune because they wanted to pursue a different careertake something else as their career but they have to work inthey are to work on a completely different track which creates a sense of dissatisfactionbrings the sense of dissatisfaction. For instance, a science graduate who is a friend of mine is now handling banking transactions and an English graduate friend of mine is solving Chemistry problems in a lab! It really makes it difficult for them to find satisfaction in their careersturns troublesome for them to bring satisfaction in their career as they were neither readyneither they were ready to deal with the matters nor they had intentions. Most of these people start their career at a later stage and become stuck to something. For a satisfying working life, I believe, people would like to have some specific issues in line with their regular salaries like a cosy working environment, flexible working hours and some extra benefits etc. If they have the facilities, they would be able to focus more on the work which gradually will bring the sense job satisfaction. However, my personal experience taught me that job satisfaction for all employees isios not possible and people's expectation for their jobs vary to a great extent. Nevertheless, my personal opinion is that a contented employee would usually seek for job security, better salary and healthyhealth working environment. To conclude, it should be kept in mind that we work to live a happy life, and if the working conditions can enhance the living we become happier. Starting a career at an early age has several advantages and happy employees are those who feel secured at their jobs and get a better salary.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response is strongest in its clear agreement and its use of personal examples to show how career mismatch can reduce satisfaction, alongside relevant mentions of pay, security, flexibility, and working conditions. Its main limitation is that it often confuses choosing a career early with starting work early, while the alternative contributors are listed rather than developed and the single-paragraph format weakens organisation. The highest-priority improvement is to distinguish these ideas and develop two workplace factors in focused paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are addressed and a clear position is maintained, but some reasoning conflates early career choice with early employment and the additional factors receive limited development.
Explain why an informed early choice might create satisfaction, then develop two separate actions or conditions people can pursue to improve working life.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a broad progression from agreement to examples and other sources of satisfaction, but the absence of paragraphing and repetition make it difficult to navigate.
Use separate paragraphs for the early-choice argument, a contrasting example, workplace conditions, and the conclusion.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss careers and job satisfaction, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce naturalness and precision.
Replace expressions such as “win the career,” “desired track,” “bring the sense job satisfaction,” and “health working environment” with standard forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of sentence structures is attempted, but recurring errors in articles, prepositions, agreement, verb forms, and clause construction reduce clarity.
Simplify long sentences and check verb patterns and prepositions, especially with “agree,” “seek,” “work,” and “satisfied.”
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. To what extent do you agree with this view? What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.