Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Correction

In recent years, more and more people are choosing to read e-books rather than paper books. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of this trend?

Sample Response

Nowadays, there has been a significant shift in the way people choose to consume text content and read books, with more and more individuals opting to read e-books instead of printed books. While there are some drawbacks to this trend, I strongly believe that the advantages of e-reading far outweigh the disadvantages.

To begin with, one of the main drawbacks of reading digital books is that it lacks the tactile and sensory experience of reading a physical book. Many people enjoy the feeling of turning pages, the smell of the ink, and the overall aesthetic of a traditional book. Additionally, e-books are often criticized for causing strain on the eyes, especially when reading for prolonged periods. For example, a recent study in Ireland reveals that young children who read digital books more than four hours a day often suffer from eye problems within the next four years.

However, there are also several compelling reasons why e-reading has become increasingly popular and beneficial. Firstly, e-books are often more convenient and accessible than their physical counterparts. They are lightweight, easily transportable, and can be stored on a single device, making it easy to carry a library of books with us wherever we go. Furthermore, e-books often cost less than paper books, making them more affordable for many readers. Additionally, e-books are also more environmentally friendly as they do not require paper, ink, and energy to produce. For instance, with the popularity of digital book reading devices, the requirement for printing and cuttng trees has decreased, and as a result, has positively impacted our environment.

In conclusion, while there are some minor disadvantages to e-reading, the advantages of this trend far overshadow them. E-books offer convenience, accessibility, and affordability, making them an increasingly popular choice among readers. Furthermore, they are environmentally friendly which is a big plus.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Avoid redundancy Original: consume text content and read books Suggested revision: read books and other texts Why it matters: Consume text content and read books overlap in meaning.
  • 2. Pronoun agreement Original: it lacks Suggested revision: they lack Why it matters: The subject is digital books, so the pronoun and verb should be plural.
  • 3. General noun Original: the smell of the ink Suggested revision: the smell of ink Why it matters: The noun is used generally here, so the article is unnecessary.
  • 4. Tense choice Original: a recent study in Ireland reveals Suggested revision: a recent study in Ireland revealed Why it matters: Past tense is more natural when referring to a completed study.
  • 5. Stronger contrast Original: However, there are also Suggested revision: Nevertheless, there are Why it matters: Nevertheless makes the contrast with the previous drawback paragraph clearer.
  • 6. Specific wording Original: more convenient and accessible Suggested revision: more convenient and widely accessible Why it matters: Widely accessible is a more precise collocation.
  • 7. Pronoun consistency Original: with us wherever we go Suggested revision: with them wherever they go Why it matters: The essay mainly discusses readers in the third person.
  • 8. Avoid repetition Original: Additionally, e-books are also Suggested revision: They are also Why it matters: The transition repeats both additionally and also.
  • 9. Precise phrasing Original: do not require paper, ink, and energy to produce Suggested revision: require no paper or ink and less physical distribution Why it matters: Digital books still require energy, so the environmental claim needs more precision.
  • 10. Spelling error Original: cuttng trees Suggested revision: cutting trees Why it matters: The word cutting is misspelled.
  • 11. Clear subject Original: as a result, has positively impacted Suggested revision: as a result, this has positively affected Why it matters: The sentence needs a clearer subject after the linking phrase.
  • 12. Natural collocation Original: far overshadow them Suggested revision: far outweigh them Why it matters: Outweigh is the expected verb for this essay question.

Suggested Rewrites

  • consume text content and read books read books and other texts
  • it lacks they lack
  • the smell of the ink the smell of ink
  • a recent study in Ireland reveals a recent study in Ireland revealed
  • However, there are also Nevertheless, there are
  • more convenient and accessible more convenient and widely accessible
Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.

TR

Task Response

7.5
Feedback

The essay directly answers the outweigh question with a clear position and covers both disadvantages and advantages. Support is relevant, though the environmental example could be more carefully reasoned.

Next step

Make the weighing stronger by explaining why the advantages are more significant than the drawbacks, not only more numerous.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.5
Feedback

The structure is clear and progression from drawback to advantages is easy to follow. Cohesive devices are controlled, though there is some repetition of e-books and additionally.

Next step

Use more precise comparative links such as nevertheless and more importantly when shifting from disadvantages to stronger advantages.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Feedback

Vocabulary is flexible and mostly accurate for the topic, with phrases such as tactile and sensory experience and physical counterparts. A few collocations and one spelling error affect polish.

Next step

Proofread for spelling and replace repeated general phrases with concise topic vocabulary.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0
Feedback

Grammar is generally accurate, with a range of complex structures. Errors are occasional and mostly local, including agreement, article use, and parallel wording.

Next step

Check singular-plural agreement and parallel lists in longer sentences.