Education is a critical element of the prosperity of a nation. The more educated people are the more prosperous the country would be. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Sample Response

Technological advancement and transformation in social stature have revolutionised human life. Has it been for the application of the Internet, smartphones, bleeding-edge technological online applications, every facet of human life has been touched and impacted! These cutting edge transgressions need an educated population to utilise and enhance their lifestyle. Thus, the argument that education is mandatory for a prosperous nation holds ground on below major rationales. To begin with, application of internet and latest communication mediums such as email and social media requires an educated people with understanding to use them. It is not possible for illiterate audiences to procure the profound usage of such devices. For an instance, as per a report from international technological advancement institute of India, smartphones and email communication has not been able to flourish in African nations where literacy level is below 20%. Evidently, it is obligatory for the citizens of a nation to be educated and aptly accept the cutting-edge technological instruments in their life and assist in the development of the nation. In addition, natural resources in a country are limited. Admittedly, it is pivotal for the nation to exhaust them with contemplation. This is possible only when the denizens are adequately educated and informed about it is consequences: if these are not consumed with cogitation. For an instance, a nation will be able to flourish if the people are using private vehicles appropriately and as a result assisting the nation to reduce the national expenses in importing the fuel. Thus, it can be corroborated that education of the citizens is vital. To sum up, it is true that in this world of highly extensive technology and limited fossil resources, it is mandatory for a country to devise an efficacious education system to educate people as the literate population is an imperative constituent for the development of a nation.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Incorrect word choice Original: cutting edge transgressions Suggested revision: cutting-edge technologies Why it matters: Transgressions means violations and does not refer to technological developments.
  • 2. Plural agreement Original: enhance their lifestyle Suggested revision: improve their lifestyles Why it matters: The plural population described here requires a plural possessive complement.
  • 3. Wrong collocation Original: holds ground Suggested revision: is well founded Why it matters: Holds ground is not the standard expression for an argument being valid.
  • 4. Faulty reason phrase Original: on below major rationales Suggested revision: for the following main reasons Why it matters: The original preposition and determiner structure is ungrammatical.
  • 5. Missing articles Original: application of internet Suggested revision: the use of the Internet Why it matters: This reference requires the definite article and Internet is conventionally capitalised.
  • 6. More natural term Original: latest communication mediums Suggested revision: modern communication media Why it matters: Media is the conventional plural noun for channels such as email and social media.
  • 7. Remove wrong article Original: requires an educated people Suggested revision: requires educated people Why it matters: An cannot modify the plural count noun people in this structure.
  • 8. Faulty modifier Original: with understanding to use them Suggested revision: who understand how to use them Why it matters: A relative clause correctly expresses the ability attributed to people.
  • 9. Inapt noun choice Original: illiterate audiences Suggested revision: people who cannot read Why it matters: Audiences suggests spectators or listeners and is unsuitable for the general population here.
  • 10. Unnatural collocation Original: procure the profound usage Suggested revision: make effective use Why it matters: Procure and profound do not combine naturally to describe using devices.
  • 11. Correct fixed phrases Original: For an instance, as per Suggested revision: For instance, according to Why it matters: For instance and according to are the standard expressions in this context.
  • 12. Clarify institution reference Original: international technological advancement institute of India Suggested revision: an international technology institute in India Why it matters: The revision gives the unnamed institution a grammatical and natural description.

Suggested Rewrites

  • cutting edge transgressions cutting-edge technologies
  • enhance their lifestyle improve their lifestyles
  • holds ground is well founded
  • on below major rationales for the following main reasons
  • application of internet the use of the Internet
  • latest communication mediums modern communication media
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 5.5

The response maintains a clear agreement position and offers two relevant lines of argument about technology and resource use. Its main limitation is that supporting explanations are sometimes implausible or logically unclear, while frequent awkward word choices and grammatical constructions make several sentences difficult to process. The highest-priority improvement is to develop each claim with a precise causal explanation and a credible example, using simpler, more accurately controlled language.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

6.0
Scoring rule

The response states a clear position and presents two relevant reasons, but parts of the support are unclear, implausible, or insufficiently developed.

Next step

Explain the causal link between education and prosperity more precisely and support each reason with a credible, directly relevant example.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

5.5
Scoring rule

The argument follows a recognisable sequence, but the single-block presentation and repetitive linking make progression mechanical and occasionally difficult to follow.

Next step

Separate the introduction, main ideas, and conclusion into clear paragraphs and use cohesive devices more selectively.

LR

Lexical Resource

5.5
Scoring rule

The response attempts a broad range of less common vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices often reduce precision.

Next step

Prioritise natural, accurately controlled vocabulary and check collocations such as those used for technology, resources, and national development.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5
Scoring rule

A mixture of simple and complex structures is attempted, but frequent errors in clause formation, agreement, articles, and pronoun reference weaken clarity.

Next step

Use shorter sentence structures while improving control of subject-verb agreement, articles, and dependent clauses.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Education is a critical element of the prosperity of a nation. The more educated people are the more prosperous the country would be. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your response

Words0
40:00

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