The advantage of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is true that the proliferation of the English language on an international scale is profoundly impacting many countries by benefiting underdeveloped nations’ businesses and tourism through globalisation and providing its people with a foundation for accessing the quality education available in developed countries. Although the drawbacks do exist, benefits are countless. I believe that the benefits of this trend have more significance than its demerits and this will continue in the coming years. The widespread usage of a single language, English in this case, attracts foreign investors and tourists from developed countries; promoting globalisation, and it has both advantages and disadvantages. Firstly, the economy is improved through the profitable businesses of multi-national companies. In addition to this, the tourists’ arrivals increase due to hospitality enjoyed when spoken to in a common language. Moreover, this influx increases the government’s revenue generated from the hospitality industry. On the other hand, the promotion of international businesses can harm the local business expansions. Furthermore, due to the increasing use of the English language, many local languages are getting less priority and thus impacting the cultural identity of many nations. English provides a solid foundation for people seeking quality education in developed countries and equips them to secure a high paying job in a multinational company. Firstly, it is the only medium of teaching instruction in the world’s top universities; an active command of the language secures an admission to a university. To add, knowledge of the language place candidates a step forward in the job hunting pool; the chances are high that the desired position is earned. While the increasing usage of English attracts foreign businesses and tourists in underdeveloped nations, local businesses may be stifled, and natives may be undermined. However, the benefits it brings to these nations through globalisation, and their people by laying a foundation for quality education eclipse its drawbacks, which in my opinion, is a positive trend.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove unnecessary emphasis Original: the drawbacks do exist Suggested revision: drawbacks exist Why it matters: The auxiliary ‘do’ adds emphasis that is unnecessary in this academic statement.
- 2. Avoid absolute claim Original: benefits are countless Suggested revision: the benefits are substantial Why it matters: ‘Countless’ is an imprecise overstatement, while ‘substantial’ preserves the positive evaluation.
- 3. Use adjective comparison Original: have more significance than Suggested revision: are more significant than Why it matters: The adjective construction is the natural way to compare significance.
- 4. Keep terminology consistent Original: demerits Suggested revision: disadvantages Why it matters: Using the prompt’s term maintains lexical consistency.
- 5. Use concise noun Original: usage Suggested revision: use Why it matters: ‘Use’ is more natural and concise when referring to a language.
- 6. Set off parenthetical Original: English in this case Suggested revision: English, in this case Why it matters: The parenthetical phrase ‘in this case’ requires a preceding comma as well as the following one.
- 7. Fix participial punctuation Original: countries; promoting globalisation Suggested revision: countries, promoting globalisation Why it matters: A semicolon cannot introduce a participial phrase that depends on the main clause.
- 8. Match multiple countries Original: the economy is improved Suggested revision: national economies are strengthened Why it matters: The discussion concerns multiple countries, and the revised passive collocation is more natural.
- 9. Use business collocation Original: profitable businesses of multi-national companies Suggested revision: profitable operations of multinational companies Why it matters: Companies conduct profitable operations, and ‘multinational’ is normally written as one word.
- 10. Remove possessive form Original: the tourists’ arrivals Suggested revision: tourist arrivals Why it matters: ‘Tourist’ functions as an attributive noun here rather than a possessive.
- 11. Clarify hospitality clause Original: hospitality enjoyed when spoken to in a common language Suggested revision: the hospitality they enjoy when communicating in a common language Why it matters: The original passive phrase wrongly suggests that tourists themselves are ‘spoken to in’ a language.
- 12. Use general revenue term Original: the government’s revenue Suggested revision: government revenue Why it matters: The uncountable attributive form suits a general claim across nations.
Suggested Rewrites
- the drawbacks do exist drawbacks exist
- benefits are countless the benefits are substantial
- have more significance than are more significant than
- demerits disadvantages
- usage use
- English in this case English, in this case
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay presents a consistent view that the advantages will continue to prevail and covers economic, tourism, educational, employment, business, and cultural effects. Its main limitation is that several claims remain broad or unsupported, while the one-paragraph structure and frequent awkward constructions reduce clarity. Prioritise organising the argument into focused advantage and disadvantage paragraphs and explaining, with a concrete example, why the benefits are likely to remain greater in future.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The position is clear and both advantages and disadvantages are relevant, but several reasons are asserted generally rather than fully explained or illustrated.
Develop one concrete example linking English to education or investment and explicitly explain why that benefit will continue to outweigh language loss.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows an understandable sequence, but the absence of paragraphing, repeated basic transitions, and loose sentence connections weaken organisation.
Use an introduction, separate economic and educational advantage paragraphs, a focused disadvantage paragraph, and a concise comparative conclusion.
Lexical Resource
There is a broad range of topic vocabulary, although frequent unnatural collocations and imprecise word choices reduce flexibility and accuracy.
Replace phrases such as ‘benefits are countless’, ‘tourists’ arrivals’, ‘getting less priority’, and ‘job hunting pool’ with idiomatic academic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex forms are attempted throughout, but agreement, article, punctuation, participle, and clause-control errors occur frequently while meaning remains mostly clear.
Prioritise complete clause structures and subject–verb agreement, especially in ‘knowledge of the language places candidates’ and the semicolon-linked sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The advantage of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.