Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
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Sample Response
I do agree withto the statement that children brought up in poor families are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents
Children of poor parents are prematurely exposed to the problems of adult life such as learningeg. learning to survive on a low family income and sacrificing luxuries for essential items. These children begin to see the realities of life in their home or social environment. Their parents' own strugglespatents’ own struggles serve as an example to them.
These children are taught necessary skills for survival as an adult from a very early age. Many children, for instance, workMany children eg work atin the weekends or holidays to either collect some pocket money or even contribute to their family income. A good example is the many children who accompany their parents to sell produce at the market. They are making a direct contribution to their families in terms of labour or income. Children of poor families are also highly motivated. They tend to set high goals to improve their economic and social situation. A relevant example would be Mr. Bill Gates( founder of Microsoft Corporation). He had an impoverished background, but he used his talent and motivation to set up the world’s largest technology companycomputer organization.
However, there are some problems that children from poor backgrounds do encounter. Many of these children who are “robbed” of their childhood by having to workchildhood eg while working, may feel cheated. They often turn to crime. This, however, is a small group.
In summing up, children with impoverished backgrounds are able to deal with problems of adult life because of early exposure, family role models and sheer motivation.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay presents a clear position and supports the main argument with relevant points regarding early responsibility and resilience. However, the development lacks comparison with wealthy children, and some examples contain factual errors. To improve, strengthen the depth of counterarguments and refine grammatical accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response clearly states an opinion and provides main points explaining why less affluent children gain practical life skills.
Ensure all illustrative examples are accurate and directly contrast the experience of poor children with those raised by wealthy parents.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is arranged in a broad logical order, though paragraphing and transitions are slightly underdeveloped toward the end.
Group ideas into well-developed paragraphs with clear topic sentences and smooth transitions between supporting points.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is varied enough to convey meaning clearly, including phrases related to financial hardship and motivation.
Focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding informal or mechanically placed abbreviations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures is present, though noticeable grammatical errors and minor typographical slips occur.
Proofread carefully to eliminate errors in possessive forms, preposition usage, and sentence punctuation.