The best way to solve the world’s environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other private vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It has been recommended that out of many solutions, the best solution is to hike the prices of petrol and diesel to ameliorate environmental hazards. I thoroughly agree with the statement because fewer vehicles will run on the road and demand for other means of transport will rise such as cycles or e-rickshaws.
First off, escalating the prices of fuel will make the masses use their types of machinery less. Resultantly, there will be less pollution. To elaborate it, the paradigm shift makes people use their individual vehicles, and the emission of toxic gases from these vehicles deteriorate the air quality, and the environment gets polluted. This contaminated ambience is not suitable for dwellers of any city or town. Therefore, if the prices increase, people will not run their vehicles. They will not enhance their financial burden, such as the money they have saved for eating outside, paying for gym facilities, and throwing parties. They will need to cut their expenses to refuel their cars or any vehicle. So, it is good to raise the prices of conventional fuel.
In addition, increasing fuel prices will assist in using other vehicles, which have no carcinogenic effect on the environment. In other words, people will use bicycles or E-rickshaws. These two modes will be conducive to reducing the financial burden of individuals and keeping them as fit as a fiddle. These models do not create pollution, and people fall less victim to many ailments. Earlier, a cyclist was considered a destitute one over a car owner. As of now, the scenario has changed. Currently, people are awarded and appreciated for becoming environmentalists. Riding a cycle or using an electronic rickshaw has no carbon emission and is safer to use. Consequently, the surroundings will not become unhealthy, and masses will be hale and hearty.
To conclude, considering the above analysis, it is ostensible that rising fuel prices will reduce the number of vehicles on the road and the need to use environmentally-friendly vehicles will increase. It will be helpful for the atmosphere and people.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix sentence opening Original: It has been recommended that out of many solutions Suggested revision: Among the proposed solutions Why it matters: The revision removes an awkward passive structure and correctly frames the comparison.
- 2. Use academic wording Original: hike Suggested revision: raise Why it matters: Raise is more neutral and appropriate than the informal verb hike.
- 3. Clarify the outcome Original: ameliorate environmental hazards Suggested revision: reduce environmental damage Why it matters: Environmental damage is something that can naturally be reduced, whereas hazards are risks.
- 4. Place example correctly Original: demand for other means of transport will rise such as cycles or e-rickshaws Suggested revision: demand for other means of transport, such as bicycles or e-rickshaws, will rise Why it matters: The example phrase must directly follow the noun phrase it illustrates.
- 5. Use formal transition Original: First off Suggested revision: First Why it matters: First is a more suitable paragraph transition for an academic essay.
- 6. Improve the collocation Original: escalating the prices of fuel Suggested revision: raising fuel prices Why it matters: Raising prices is the conventional collocation for a deliberate price increase.
- 7. Use neutral wording Original: make the masses Suggested revision: make people Why it matters: People is clearer and more natural than the masses in this context.
- 8. Name the object precisely Original: their types of machinery Suggested revision: their vehicles Why it matters: Vehicles, rather than types of machinery, are the objects whose use would decrease.
- 9. Use natural connector Original: Resultantly Suggested revision: As a result Why it matters: As a result is the more natural transition in this context.
- 10. Use natural phrasing Original: dwellers Suggested revision: residents Why it matters: Residents is the standard term for people who live in a city or town.
- 11. Correct the verb choice Original: people will not run their vehicles Suggested revision: people will use their vehicles less Why it matters: Use a vehicle less expresses the intended reduction in driving accurately.
- 12. Remove awkward repetition Original: refuel their cars or any vehicle Suggested revision: refuel their vehicles Why it matters: The concise plural phrase covers cars and other private vehicles without repetition.
Suggested Rewrites
- It has been recommended that out of many solutions Among the proposed solutions
- hike raise
- ameliorate environmental hazards reduce environmental damage
- demand for other means of transport will rise such as cycles or e-rickshaws demand for other means of transport, such as bicycles or e-rickshaws, will rise
- First off First
- escalating the prices of fuel raising fuel prices
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is strongest in its clear agreement, straightforward organization, and sustained explanation of how higher fuel prices could reduce private-vehicle use. Its main limitation is that it assumes this policy is the best solution without weighing it against alternatives, while frequent unnatural word choices reduce precision. The highest-priority improvement is to justify the comparative claim directly and express the supporting ideas in more natural, exact language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is clear and both main reasons are developed, but the claim that fuel-price increases are the best solution is not critically established.
Compare fuel pricing with at least one plausible environmental measure and explain why the proposed policy would be more effective overall.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are arranged in a logical four-paragraph structure, although some linking is mechanical and several supporting sentences repeat the same consequence.
Use fewer formulaic transitions and organize each body paragraph around a concise claim, mechanism, and outcome.
Lexical Resource
The response shows a broad vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate or unnatural choices such as “types of machinery,” “carcinogenic effect,” and “ostensible” weaken precision.
Prioritize natural topic-specific collocations such as “private vehicles,” “zero-emission transport,” and “it is clear” over conspicuous but imprecise alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of simple and complex sentences is generally controlled, with some agreement, reference, and construction errors that rarely obstruct meaning.
Check subject-verb agreement and revise awkward verb patterns, especially in sentences describing emissions, vehicle use, and the effects of price rises.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The best way to solve the world’s environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other private vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.