As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization. Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Sample Response
Mass communication and transport are growing at a faster rate and provide an opportunity to become a change in international globalisation. Because of this incredible growth we have to limit the world, able to reach people in a smaller span of time and can see and roam all over the globe. Some people think this change is not good for their culture and are strongly against itagainst to it. In my opinion, change plays a vital role in someone's growth. If we look at historylook at the history, we have accepted many changeswe accepted many changes in our day to day life which made our liveslife comfortable and easiereasy to live. We are in the 21st century and we have a solution for almost everything. For example, a patient who is suffering from a severe disease and not receiving effective treatmentnot getting a better treatment in one place, he would have the option to get treatment in another place, maybe in some other country. We get this information via the internet, television and news reportsvia internet, TV, news. This is how people connect and help each otherare connected and helping each other to survive and excel in their life. On another pointYet to another part of above, a culture can not be represented by the dress someone wears, the language someone speaks; it iswhat someone speaks, It’s just a lifestyle that someone acceptswhich is acceptable by someone and helps them lead their liveshelp lead their life all with happiness. Although humans have different characteristics,Though the human has different characteristic but they have the same emotions and feelings towards their own family membersmember. They can act differently in some situationssituation but pain and sorrow are almost the samethe pain and sorrows are almost same in all human beingsbeing because that's God given. Therefore, I do not agree that mass communication and transport has a negative impact on culturegives any negative impact on culture, it is someone's own perception and totally depends on them that what changes they like to embed in their life. Hence, criticising other culture and not giving human value can bring disaster and put us in soup.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response maintains a generally identifiable disagreement and shows some ability to discuss globalization through examples of communication and mobility. However, much of the development concerns convenience, medical treatment, or shared human emotions rather than directly explaining why cultural identity will not be lost. The highest priority is to build a focused argument about cultural preservation, supported by relevant examples, while improving sentence control and word choice.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A position against the claim is eventually clear, but the supporting discussion often drifts away from the question of total cultural loss.
Organise the argument around specific reasons cultural identity can survive globalization, such as traditions, education, or local institutions.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a loose line from technological change to human similarity and the conclusion, but the single-block presentation and weak transitions limit progression.
Separate the response into an introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with each body paragraph advancing one reason for the position.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss communication, mobility, culture, and human experience, though awkward or inaccurate phrasing is frequent.
Replace vague or unnatural expressions with precise topic language such as cultural practices, local identity, global influence, and preservation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied and complex sentences, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, clauses, and punctuation reduce control and occasionally impede reading.
Write shorter complete sentences first, checking subject-verb agreement, article use, and clause boundaries before combining ideas.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization. Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.