Some people think that the government should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as the resources are limited, while others think we can use as much water as we want. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Sample Response
There has always been the most issue over the uses of water. It is all good that there must be rigid control of Management oversupplying freshwater; due to limited resources, while others consider people can use water accordingly. In my perspective, due to limited resources, control over the usage of water is mandatory, as posterity will not be able to see natural resources of water, as well as human survival is impossible without water.
To commence with, it is suggested that the regime must have control over the usage of water. It is owing to the burgeoning population. To elaborate, the population is soaring, and there is a need for as much water as the population is. So if there is no control over it, people will not get adequate water to drink, and they will die. Moreover, overconsumption of water for domestic chores such as washing cars or gardens, the floor of the house, and name but a few, can create a water crisis. So above mentioned reasons make it mandatory to have control of the government on the utility of water. If the government imposed a heavy penalty, people would not use wastewater. They will endeavour to assist the government by making salty water able to drink by filtering it.
On the other hand, people argue that it is their right to use water according to their desire. They think they pay a water bill. Hence, they can use it for any purpose. Moreover, they consider through the filtration process that rainwater can be used, so it is the state’s responsibility to provide them with basic need at any cost. Moreover, another strong argument explains that people get fresh water for a few hours a day, so it sometimes seems impossible to do all household chores. So, there is a need of using freshwater, and people must not be stopped using it.
In conclusion, in consideration of the above analysis, it is ostensible that to save humanity and wildlife, it is essential to curb on supplying freshwater due to scarcity of natural source. In this way, future generation would be able to see the traditional ways of getting water, and marine life can be saved.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix the preposition Original: In Suggested revision: From Why it matters: The standard expression uses 'from' rather than 'in'.
- 2. Join clauses correctly Original: as well as human survival is impossible Suggested revision: and human survival is impossible Why it matters: 'As well as' does not correctly coordinate the two independent claims in this sentence.
- 3. Use consistent terminology Original: regime Suggested revision: government Why it matters: 'Government' is the neutral term used throughout the argument and is more appropriate here.
- 4. Make examples parallel Original: washing cars or gardens Suggested revision: washing cars or watering gardens Why it matters: Gardens are watered rather than washed, so the second activity needs its own verb.
- 5. Complete the activity Original: the floor of the house Suggested revision: washing floors Why it matters: The list requires another activity rather than a standalone noun phrase.
- 6. Fix the expression Original: and Suggested revision: to Why it matters: The fixed expression introducing a partial list is 'to name but a few'.
- 7. Use natural phrasing Original: control of the government on the utility of water Suggested revision: government control over water use Why it matters: The revision uses the standard collocation 'control over' and expresses the meaning concisely.
- 8. Distinguish waste water Original: use wastewater Suggested revision: waste water Why it matters: 'Wastewater' is used water, while the intended verb phrase means using water unnecessarily.
- 9. Use precise wording Original: salty water able to drink Suggested revision: salt water drinkable Why it matters: The revised phrase uses the standard noun and adjective construction.
- 10. Use natural phrasing Original: according to their desire Suggested revision: as they wish Why it matters: This expression states the intended freedom of choice more naturally.
- 11. Specify the singular noun Original: basic need Suggested revision: this basic need Why it matters: The singular countable noun needs a determiner in this clause.
- 12. Fix reporting phrase Original: another strong argument explains Suggested revision: another argument is Why it matters: An argument can state or be a claim, but it does not 'explain that' in this construction.
Suggested Rewrites
- In From
- as well as human survival is impossible and human survival is impossible
- regime government
- washing cars or gardens washing cars or watering gardens
- the floor of the house washing floors
- and to
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response has a clear opinion and gives substantial attention to both views, using a conventional structure that makes the overall argument easy to follow. However, several explanations are repetitive or logically unclear, and frequent inaccurate word choices and grammatical constructions weaken precision. The highest priority is to express fewer, better-supported arguments in direct language and check that each example supports the point being made.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both perspectives and a consistent opinion are presented, but some supporting points are insufficiently explained or logically uncertain.
Develop one strong reason for each view with a realistic consequence or example, then link the conclusion directly to that reasoning.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and an understandable discussion structure support progression, though connectors are repetitive and some sentences do not link smoothly.
Reduce repeated transitions such as moreover and so, and use clearer logical links between claims, reasons, and examples.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a reasonably broad vocabulary, but frequent miscollocations and unsuitable word choices sometimes distort the intended meaning.
Use precise topic language such as water consumption, conservation, and supply restrictions, and avoid replacing familiar words with inaccurate formal alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is an attempt to use varied and complex sentences, but frequent errors with articles, prepositions, agreement, and clause construction reduce control.
Practise building accurate complex sentences around one main clause and edit carefully for articles, plurals, and verb forms.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that the government should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as the resources are limited, while others think we can use as much water as we want. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.