Some governments try to control the way a national language is used. For example, they may restrict the introduction of foreign words, or the use of dialects, or they may demand that a certain language be used in schools. What are the benefits and disadvantages of these policies? Do you think they can ever be effective?
Sample Response
Often governments try to control the use of any specific language at different levels and it begins infrom schools. Basically, the government wants to emphasise the state language above everything elseunderscore on state language other than anything. Such policies have some advantages and disadvantagesdemerits too. A comparative discussion followsA comparative discussion is done in the following paragraphs. First of all, the government puts emphasis on the mother tongue of the state so that children can learnthe kids could learn the state language effectively and communicate. As a result, the kids become proficient inturn expert on national language. Further, as they become proficientas they are expert, communication is easier for them within the countryinside the national boundary. Actually, when kids are in schools and they haveare to learn several languages, it becomes difficult for them to cope with the words, dialects and other linguistic issues. Thereby, emphasis on a certain languageimportance on certain language in school is reasonable. For instance, in most Asian countriesmost of the Asian countries, it is compulsory to study the mother tongue in elementary schools. On the other hand, teaching a certain language may create a sense of excessive dependencedependency on that specific language. As a result, it may hamper their communication skills in other contextshamper their communication skills in a different perspective. They will lose confidence in communicatinglose confidence to communicate in the international settingsenvironment. My 5-year old daughter, Samantha, is atin her elementary school here in France. The school strictly forbids the use of Englishforbids using English or any language other than Frenchany other language than French during the school hours. The intentions are respectable and kids are learning French perfectly. But at the same time, kids are losing their ability to communicate in English or in other international languages. Learning it in a later phase of life is less effective than learning at an early age, I think. Finally, after the aforesaid arguments, I believe adoption of such policies is ineffective. The ratio of demerits is almost equal to its benefits. So, if we justify the needs, the outcomes will be under satisfactory level. In a true sense, there are no advantages of this initiative at all, mere a waste of time. Hence, governments should deeply investigate the matter to make the right choice.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response covers benefits, disadvantages, and effectiveness, and its school-language example gives the discussion a concrete and relevant basis. The main weakness is an internally inconsistent conclusion that first balances the two sides and then claims there are no advantages, while language inaccuracies recur throughout. The highest priority is to present a consistent final judgement and refine the grammatical and lexical accuracy of the supporting argument.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
All parts of the task are addressed with relevant explanation and an example, but the final judgement contradicts the benefits established earlier.
State whether these policies can work under limited conditions and ensure that this judgement follows consistently from the preceding comparison.
Coherence and Cohesion
The discussion progresses from benefits to disadvantages and then a conclusion, but the lack of paragraphing and some repetitive linking weaken organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for benefits, disadvantages, and effectiveness, and give each paragraph a clear central claim.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, but frequent collocation and word-choice problems make several claims sound unnatural or imprecise.
Use more accurate combinations such as emphasise the national language, become proficient, communicate internationally, and produce unsatisfactory outcomes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex forms are used and meaning remains generally clear, although errors in articles, prepositions, agreement, and sentence construction are frequent.
Edit each sentence for article and preposition use, agreement, and complete clause structure, especially in evaluative statements.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some governments try to control the way a national language is used. For example, they may restrict the introduction of foreign words, or the use of dialects, or they may demand that a certain language be used in schools. What are the benefits and disadvantages of these policies? Do you think they can ever be effective?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.