The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
The society in which we are living has growing trend to watch movies and television programs. People seek enjoyment and relaxation by watching screen-based mediaobserving electronic media. In my opinion, the government shouldIn my opinion, Government should regulatecheck the level of violence in movies and other television programmeselectronic media programs because every scene leaves an impression on the mindputs some imprints in the brain. These pictures remain in viewers' memoriesstay in memories and affect personalitygive impact on personality.
Violence has multiple effectsimpacts on human psychology. Kids choose to get guns and pistols in the form of toys after watching violence on media screen. Some young boys seek pleasure by copying this sort of crimecrimes in real life because they are influenced by their heroesin real life being impressed by their heroes. Middle aged womenladies become frightened while thinking of their family members living in a society that hasthis society that is having an unusual show of violent episodes. Older peopleOld guys become depressed after observing brutal clips on the cinema screen.
On the other hand, some viewers have a tendencysome portion of viewers has a propensity to relax and enjoy themselvesto enjoy and relaxation after seeing episodes of thrill and war. Clips without violence are unappealing to themnot palatable to them. The majority of these people are mature enough, they don’t copy such content in real lifethis stuff in their real life. They watch the movies, make their brain relaxed and then forget the events.
In short, Government should introduce a strict policy to regulate media contentmake strict policy to control the activity of media. Violent episodes may be there but only for the sake of the thrill. The lesson of the story should be very constructive and informative.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response’s clearest strength is its consistent support for government control, with logically separated discussion of harmful effects and an opposing view. However, several claims are generalized or stereotyped, the counterargument is only briefly evaluated, and the response falls slightly below the expected length. The highest priority is to develop one or two precise, well-explained links between media violence, criminal behaviour, and effective regulation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response maintains a relevant position and presents arguments on both sides, but support is uneven and sometimes generalized.
Explain more precisely how exposure could lead to violent crime and how the proposed controls would reduce that outcome.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraph structure and overall progression are clear, although some connections within sentences are mechanical or loosely expressed.
Use clearer logical links when moving from examples about different age groups to the central claim about crime and regulation.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the topic, but recurrent collocation and register problems reduce precision and naturalness.
Replace awkward phrases such as give impact, some portion of viewers, and old guys with accurate formal alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex forms are attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, sentence boundaries, and word forms weaken control.
Prioritise accurate clause construction and article use, then proofread each complex sentence for agreement and complete grammatical patterns.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.