Government should invest in teaching science subjects rather than other subjects for country development and progress. To what extent do you agree or not agree?
Sample Response
In recent years, there has been talk of prioritising science over other subjects for the sake of national progress. Although science is important, I argue that humanities subjects should also be included in the curriculum.
Science could be said to have been a revolutionising force in improving the material conditions of humanity and thus can be argued to rightfully be prioritised within any learning program. Scientific breakthroughs allow production processes to become more efficient, improving both the quality and quantities of goods. These goods can either be exported to the international market, improving a country’s prosperity, or used by the domestic population to improve their lives. It was through improving its scientific research that the United States, for example, is at the forefront of technology and leads in economic and military prowess.
However, one might also argue that arts and humanities should be taught as well, for they create the leaders that can effectively guide science to its most socially beneficial conclusions. Science could be said to be a tool, and like other tools, require a direction that it can be used towards. More specifically, there are many ethical problems with using scientific technology such as gene editing that requires those who can consider the potential social consequences. Without arts and humanities, science might not serve the benefit of mankind, and might lead us towards a very dark path.
Therefore, I believe that although science is important, it cannot be left on its own. As such, along with a new generation of scientists, governments should also invest in bringing up a generation of philosophers and politicians.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the standard adjective Original: revolutionising Suggested revision: revolutionary Why it matters: Revolutionary is the more natural adjective for a force that produces major change.
- 2. Use precise academic wording Original: rightfully Suggested revision: justifiably Why it matters: Justifiably more precisely conveys that the priority has sound reasons.
- 3. Keep number consistent Original: quantities Suggested revision: quantity Why it matters: Quantity should remain singular when paired with the general uncountable quality.
- 4. Choose a suitable noun Original: conclusions Suggested revision: outcomes Why it matters: Science can be guided toward outcomes, while conclusions are usually reached through reasoning.
- 5. Restore the subject Original: like other tools, require Suggested revision: like other tools, it requires Why it matters: The clause requires the pronoun it to agree with the singular subject Science.
- 6. Fix the directional phrase Original: a direction that it can be used towards Suggested revision: clear direction for its use Why it matters: The replacement removes the unidiomatic construction used towards.
- 7. Use a natural collocation Original: serve the benefit of mankind Suggested revision: serve the interests of humanity Why it matters: Serve the interests of is the standard expression for providing benefit.
- 8. Correct the path metaphor Original: towards Suggested revision: down Why it matters: Lead someone down a path is the established metaphorical construction.
- 9. Clarify the policy meaning Original: left on its own Suggested revision: prioritised in isolation Why it matters: The replacement connects the claim more precisely to investment and curriculum priorities.
- 10. Use an education verb Original: bringing up a generation Suggested revision: educating a generation Why it matters: Educating is more appropriate than bringing up for a government's investment in learning.
- 11. Use education terminology Original: learning program Suggested revision: education programme Why it matters: Education programme is more precise in this curriculum context and matches the essay's British spelling.
- 12. Use the broader plural Original: market Suggested revision: markets Why it matters: The plural better reflects exports being sold across multiple foreign markets.
Suggested Rewrites
- revolutionising revolutionary
- rightfully justifiably
- quantities quantity
- conclusions outcomes
- like other tools, require like other tools, it requires
- a direction that it can be used towards clear direction for its use
Why this response received Band 7.5
The essay presents a thoughtful, clearly sustained position and develops both the economic value of science and the ethical role of the humanities with relevant reasoning and an effective example. Its main limitation lies in several grammatical and collocational slips within ambitious sentences, which occasionally blur otherwise precise points. The highest-priority improvement is to revise complex clauses for agreement, tense consistency, and idiomatic phrasing while retaining the balanced, well-sequenced argument.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses the investment priority, sustains a clear qualified disagreement, and develops both sides with relevant reasoning.
Refine the position by stating explicitly how governments should balance science and humanities funding in practice.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is clearly sequenced, paragraphing is well managed, and links between the economic and ethical dimensions are smooth.
Reduce repeated framing such as could be said to make the progression even more direct and economical.
Lexical Resource
The essay uses a wide and flexible academic vocabulary, though a few word combinations are awkward or insufficiently precise.
Revise collocations such as quantities of goods, direction used towards, and bringing up a generation for more idiomatic expression.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A broad range of complex structures is attempted successfully, but several agreement and tense errors remain noticeable.
Check agreement in clauses involving science, tools, and ethical problems, and keep tense relationships consistent within examples.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Government should invest in teaching science subjects rather than other subjects for country development and progress. To what extent do you agree or not agree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.