Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Is this a negative or positive trend?
Sample Response
In modern society, there has been a growing concern that many couples have delayed parenthood. This social trend could be ascribed to a number of factors, including the tendency for young couples to prioritise their work over having children and the belief that it is better for children to be brought up by older parents. Overall, it is more of a negative rather than a positive trend.
A few reasons can be given to justify the trend of giving birth at later stages of life. The primary reason is that the labour market is increasingly competitive, and it is a norm that young couples defer having children to devote more of their time to lay a sound foundation for their future career. Another significant reason is that it is believed that children are raised better by older parents. This seems valid due to the fact that older fathers and mothers are generally wealthier, more experienced, and more willing to take the responsibility of bringing up a child.
There is compelling evidence that the negative aspects of this trend outweigh its positive ones. From a positive perspective, children born to more prosperous and experienced parents are likely to receive more comprehensive education, and thus contribute more to society when they reach adulthood. In each household, the parents may also reap the benefits of this trend, as their first working years are not interrupted by pregnancy and childcare. From a negative standpoint, however, delayed parenthood is associated with a number of health risks that are far more significant than the aforementioned advantages. When an aged couple decide to give birth, there are serious health risks for the woman in the prenatal and postnatal period, such as excessive bleeding after childbirth. If any complicated maternal health problem arises, the life of the whole family would be irreparably damaged.
In summary, the tendency to have children at a later age is caused by a number of factors, such as the competitiveness of the job market for young adults. Although there are a few benefits of this trend such as the prospect of children getting better education and young parents having more working time, the drawbacks including the health risks of the mother are far more significant for couples to consider.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Describe the trend directly Original: growing concern that many couples have delayed parenthood Suggested revision: growing trend of couples delaying parenthood Why it matters: Concern describes a feeling, whereas trend directly names the observed social pattern.
- 2. Correct comparison Original: more of a negative rather than a positive trend Suggested revision: more negative than positive Why it matters: The original combines two incompatible comparative structures.
- 3. Use precise verb Original: justify Suggested revision: explain Why it matters: Reasons explain why a trend occurs rather than justify its existence.
- 4. Use concise phrasing Original: at later stages of life Suggested revision: later in life Why it matters: Later in life is the natural expression for delayed parenthood.
- 5. Correct clause structure Original: it is a norm that young couples Suggested revision: it is common for young couples Why it matters: The revised structure correctly introduces the infinitive defer.
- 6. Use gerund after to Original: lay Suggested revision: laying Why it matters: In devote time to, to is a preposition and must be followed by a gerund.
- 7. Use plural noun Original: career Suggested revision: careers Why it matters: The plural couples are establishing separate careers, so the noun should be plural.
- 8. Correct responsibility phrase Original: take the responsibility of bringing up Suggested revision: take responsibility for bringing up Why it matters: Take responsibility for is the standard grammatical pattern.
- 9. Add required article Original: more comprehensive education Suggested revision: a more comprehensive education Why it matters: Education is countable here because it refers to the education an individual receives.
- 10. Natural career phrase Original: first Suggested revision: early Why it matters: Early working years more clearly refers to the beginning of their careers.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: When an aged couple decide to give birth, there are serious health risks for the woman in the prenatal and postnatal period, such as excessive bleeding after childbirth. Suggested revision: When an older couple decides to have a child, the woman faces serious prenatal and postnatal health risks, such as excessive bleeding after childbirth. Why it matters: The rewrite fixes subject-verb agreement and avoids implying that both members of a couple give birth.
- 12. Sentence rewrite Original: If any complicated maternal health problem arises, the life of the whole family would be irreparably damaged. Suggested revision: If a serious maternal health problem arises, the whole family could be irreparably affected. Why it matters: The revision replaces unnatural collocations while preserving the stated consequence for the family.
Suggested Rewrites
- growing concern that many couples have delayed parenthood growing trend of couples delaying parenthood
- more of a negative rather than a positive trend more negative than positive
- justify explain
- at later stages of life later in life
- it is a norm that young couples it is common for young couples
- lay laying
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its comprehensive, well-organised treatment of both the causes of delayed parenthood and its positive and negative consequences, supported by a consistently clear position. Its main limitation is that the negative case rests largely on one health-related line of reasoning and occasionally uses slightly overstated or imprecise phrasing. The best refinement would be to deepen that evaluation with a second distinct drawback and more measured claims.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses both questions, maintains a clear judgement, and develops relevant reasons and consequences with effective support.
Strengthen the evaluation further by adding a second distinct negative consequence rather than relying mainly on maternal health risks.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are logically sequenced through well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices guide the reader smoothly without obscuring progression.
Make the transition within the advantages-and-disadvantages paragraph slightly less formulaic while preserving its clear comparative structure.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary is used flexibly across employment, parenting, education, and health, with only occasional awkward phrasing.
Replace slightly imprecise expressions such as aged couple with more natural and measured alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a wide range of complex structures with strong control, and minor slips do not impede communication.
Refine agreement and noun-phrase choices in the few less natural constructions to achieve greater consistency.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Is this a negative or positive trend?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.