In many cities, there is little control on the design and construction of new houses, so people can build houses in their own styles rather than building them with the same style as the old houses in the local area. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Sample Response
In many cities around the world, people have little influence in the design and construction of their houses. Many people believe it is better to allow people to freely choose the style and construction of their new homes rather than forcing everyone to follow the uniform style of the local area. In my opinion, a diversity in housing styles can bring many more benefits than drawbacks to an area.
To begin with, cities in Vietnam, such as Saigon, have very few, or even no, regulations on local housing styles, which means that residents in these areas are free to decide on the architecture for their home. (1) The only disadvantage that may arise is the lack of uniformity of houses, which can be a unique feature in certain places. The houses in Hoi An, for instance, demonstrate a consistent style and therefore have made the city a popular tourist destination. If the house owners in this city change the style and break this uniformity, the number of tourists visiting the area is likely to decrease.
However, the advantages brought about by a diversity in housing styles are more worthy of consideration. Firstly, buildings reflecting a variety of architectural designs can make a city more attractive and appealing to people of different cultures. For example, the buildings in the centre of Ho Chi Minh city are designed in both European and Asian styles, which has eventually given the city a more cosmopolitan atmosphere, with residents coming from many different countries. (2) Secondly, the freedom of choice in housing styles can allow local people to be more creative, as they can design their homes in a unique way.
In conclusion, though potentially making some areas less attractive by losing a part of their character, a diversity in architectural styles should be widely encouraged, as it can beautify a city and allow residents to be more creative.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix preposition Original: in Suggested revision: over Why it matters: Influence takes over when it means control of a process.
- 2. Remove unnecessary article Original: a diversity in housing styles can Suggested revision: diversity in housing styles can Why it matters: Diversity is used as an uncountable abstract noun in this construction.
- 3. Match plural reference Original: home Suggested revision: homes Why it matters: The plural residents requires the plural homes in this general statement.
- 4. Delete stray marker Original: (1) Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This unexplained drafting marker interrupts the flow between sentences.
- 5. Use concise noun Original: house owners Suggested revision: homeowners Why it matters: Homeowners is the standard concise term for people who own their homes.
- 6. Clarify possession Original: change the style Suggested revision: change their homes' styles Why it matters: The possessive form clarifies which styles the homeowners would change.
- 7. Use natural comparison Original: more worthy of consideration Suggested revision: more significant Why it matters: More significant expresses the intended comparison more directly and naturally.
- 8. Capitalise place name Original: city Suggested revision: City Why it matters: City is part of the proper place name and should be capitalised.
- 9. Delete stray marker Original: (2) Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This unexplained drafting marker disrupts the transition to the second advantage.
- 10. Simplify verb structure Original: the freedom of choice in housing styles can allow Suggested revision: freedom to choose housing styles allows Why it matters: The simpler structure avoids the redundant combination of can and allow.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: The only disadvantage that may arise is the lack of uniformity of houses, which can be a unique feature in certain places. Suggested revision: The only disadvantage that may arise is the loss of uniformity, since a consistent architectural style can be a distinctive feature of certain places. Why it matters: The original relative clause mistakenly presents a lack of uniformity as the distinctive feature valued by certain places.
Suggested Rewrites
- in over
- a diversity in housing styles can diversity in housing styles can
- home homes
- (1) Delete
- house owners homeowners
- change the style change their homes' styles
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response maintains a clear position, organizes the comparison effectively, and uses varied, mostly precise language with strong grammatical control. The main limitation is that the creativity advantage receives only brief explanation, while a few expressions sound less natural than the surrounding prose. The highest-priority improvement is to extend that key advantage and connect it more explicitly to why the benefits outweigh the loss of local uniformity.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The question is directly answered with a consistent position, relevant discussion of both sides, and generally well-supported examples.
Develop the second advantage beyond a single assertion and weigh it explicitly against the identified disadvantage.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are sequenced clearly, paragraphs have distinct functions, and cohesive devices guide the comparison smoothly.
Remove the unexplained parenthetical numbers and vary the overt sequencing markers for an even more polished flow.
Lexical Resource
A broad, topic-appropriate vocabulary is used flexibly, with only occasional awkward collocations or imprecise phrasing.
Refine phrases such as a diversity in housing styles and more worthy of consideration into more idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled accurately, and the great majority of sentences are error-free.
Check the few remaining preposition and noun-reference choices, such as influence in and residents designing their home.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In many cities, there is little control on the design and construction of new houses, so people can build houses in their own styles rather than building them with the same style as the old houses in the local area. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.