Most of the urgent problems can only be solved with international cooperation. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is often argued that the world’s most pressing challenges, from climate change to disease control, can only be resolved through cooperation among nations. While some believe individual countries can manage these issues independently, I strongly agree that lasting solutions demand global collaboration.
Environmental problems are fundamentally international in nature. Air pollution, ocean acidification, and climate instability do not respect national borders. For example, even if Greenland decided to halt all emissions tomorrow, its glaciers would still melt if other countries continue to burn coal. A striking illustration of the power of cooperation can be imagined in a recent hypothetical treaty in which every country agrees to launch reflective “sky sails” into the upper atmosphere to deflect solar radiation. No single nation could finance, launch, and monitor millions of such sails; however, through shared technology and pooled budgets, this collective effort could theoretically reduce global temperatures by 0.5°C within a decade.
Similarly, public health crises require synchronized global responses. The COVID-19 pandemic revealed that an outbreak in one small town can spread worldwide in weeks. A purely national strategy would be as ineffective as locking one door while leaving all the windows open. Imagine a future scenario in which scientists from twenty nations collaborate via a quantum computer grid to instantly simulate virus mutations and design counter-vaccines within hours. This would be impossible without seamless cooperation in data sharing, logistics, and ethics.
In conclusion, the interconnectedness of today’s world ensures that isolated solutions are no longer sufficient. Whether cooling the planet or containing disease, only a united human effort that transcends political borders can address the most urgent problems threatening our collective future.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use concise terminology Original: fundamentally international in nature Suggested revision: inherently transnational Why it matters: The replacement conveys the cross-border quality more concisely.
- 2. Match hypothetical tense Original: continue Suggested revision: continued Why it matters: The past form matches the hypothetical conditional introduced by decided.
- 3. Strengthen parallel structure Original: through shared technology and pooled budgets Suggested revision: by sharing technology and pooling budgets Why it matters: Parallel gerunds express the two coordinated actions more smoothly.
- 4. Sharpen the example Original: one small town Suggested revision: a single small town Why it matters: Single emphasizes the limited starting point more precisely.
- 5. Use precise scientific phrasing Original: instantly simulate virus mutations Suggested revision: rapidly model viral mutations Why it matters: Model and viral form a more natural technical expression here.
- 6. Use standard term Original: counter-vaccines Suggested revision: vaccines Why it matters: Counter-vaccine is not a standard term for a vaccine designed against a virus.
- 7. Clarify coordination areas Original: cooperation in data sharing, logistics, and ethics Suggested revision: cooperation on data sharing, logistics, and ethical standards Why it matters: The revised preposition and final noun make the three areas of coordination clearer.
- 8. Tighten the opening phrase Original: world’s most pressing challenges Suggested revision: most urgent global challenges Why it matters: The replacement retains the meaning while making the phrase more compact.
- 9. Use concise adverb Original: among nations Suggested revision: internationally Why it matters: The adverb expresses the same cross-national relationship more concisely.
- 10. Use direct wording Original: do not respect national borders Suggested revision: cross national borders Why it matters: The replacement states the cross-border effect directly and avoids personification.
- 11. Refine the hypothetical Original: halt all emissions tomorrow Suggested revision: eliminate all emissions immediately Why it matters: The replacement makes the hypothetical cessation more precise in formal prose.
- 12. Sentence rewrite Original: A striking illustration of the power of cooperation can be imagined in a recent hypothetical treaty in which every country agrees to launch reflective “sky sails” into the upper atmosphere to deflect solar radiation. Suggested revision: A hypothetical treaty in which every country agreed to launch reflective “sky sails” into the upper atmosphere to deflect solar radiation would illustrate the power of cooperation. Why it matters: The rewrite removes the contradiction between recent and hypothetical and aligns the conditional verb forms.
Suggested Rewrites
- fundamentally international in nature inherently transnational
- continue continued
- through shared technology and pooled budgets by sharing technology and pooling budgets
- one small town a single small town
- instantly simulate virus mutations rapidly model viral mutations
- counter-vaccines vaccines
Why this response received Band 8.5
The response presents a consistently clear position and develops two persuasive, logically organised lines of argument with precise, varied language and strong grammatical control. The main limitation is that some support relies on highly speculative technology, which slightly weakens the real-world persuasiveness of otherwise sophisticated reasoning. Prioritise replacing one hypothetical scenario with concrete evidence of successful international coordination while retaining the essay’s focused progression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is direct and fully sustained, with well-developed arguments on environmental and public-health cooperation, though the speculative examples slightly limit persuasiveness.
Ground at least one argument in a concrete international agreement or coordinated health response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress seamlessly through well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices are varied, unobtrusive and accurately used.
For further refinement, make the transition from each real-world premise to its hypothetical illustration even more compact.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise and natural, with confident control of topic-specific and abstract language apart from a few slightly constructed terms.
Prefer established terms over novel expressions such as technological labels that may sound speculative or artificial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A full range of complex structures is used accurately and flexibly, with consistently controlled punctuation and virtually no errors.
Maintain this level of accuracy while varying occasional sentence openings to make the style even less patterned.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Most of the urgent problems can only be solved with international cooperation. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.