Is it better to rear children in a joint family or in a nuclear family? Which do you think has greater positive impact on the child’s future?
Sample Response
With the proliferation of technology and adoption of Western cultureadaptation of western culture, the interaction between family members is declining. Compared withAs compared to extended familiesthe extended families in the past, in the modern era, nuclear families are becoming more commonare prevailing. But in my opinionaccording to my opinion, large families play a major role in shapinga great role to shape children's futuresa children's future.
Why this response received Band 4.5
The response communicates a preference for a joint or extended family and uses some ambitious vocabulary, so its central direction is identifiable. However, at only 50 words, it offers almost no explanation, comparison, or support and therefore cannot adequately answer either part of the task. The priority is to build a full essay with developed reasons and specific examples showing why the chosen family structure benefits a child's future.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A preference for larger families is stated, but the two-part question is barely addressed and no idea is developed or supported.
Explain several concrete benefits of the preferred family type, compare it with the alternative, and support the argument with examples in at least 250 words.
Coherence and Cohesion
The three sentences follow a basic background-to-position sequence, but the extreme brevity prevents paragraphing or sustained progression.
Organise the response into an introduction, developed body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with each paragraph advancing one clear idea.
Lexical Resource
There is some less common vocabulary, but several collocations and expressions are inaccurate, including references to technology, culture, and personal opinion.
Choose natural, precise phrases such as technological development, influence of Western culture, and in my opinion, and check article and possessive use.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex structures are attempted and meaning remains clear, although agreement, article, possessive, and verb-pattern errors occur repeatedly in the short response.
Practise subject-verb agreement and noun phrases, and use forms such as help shape a child's future accurately.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Is it better to rear children in a joint family or in a nuclear family? Which do you think has greater positive impact on the child’s future?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.