Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?
Sample Response
In response to the evolving dynamics of the modern workforce, several countries have implemented laws aimed at restricting working hours for employees. This essay will explore the reasons behind the introduction of such legislation and opine that it constitutes a positive development.
The primary motivation behind the implementation of laws limiting working hours is to safeguard the well-being and health of employees. Prolonged and excessive working hours can lead to physical and mental exhaustion, increasing the risk of stress-related illnesses, burnout, and decreased productivity. By establishing legal limits on working hours, governments seek to promote a healthier work-life balance and protect workers from exploitation by employers who may demand excessive overtime without adequate compensation. In Japan, the government introduced the "Premium Friday" initiative, encouraging companies to allow employees to leave work early on the last Friday of every month. This aimed to address overwork issues, promoting better work-life balance and reducing stress-related health issues.
I believe it is a positive development as limiting working hours can have broader societal benefits, including reducing unemployment rates and stimulating economic growth. By enforcing regulations that cap working hours, governments create opportunities for more individuals to enter the labour market, thereby spreading employment opportunities across a larger segment of the population. Additionally, shorter working hours can lead to increased spending on leisure activities, contributing to the growth of industries such as tourism, entertainment, and hospitality. As employees have more free time due to shorter working hours, they may choose to spend their leisure time travelling to new destinations, dining out at restaurants, or attending concerts and events, stimulating the tourism, entertainment, and hospitality sectors.
In conclusion, the introduction of laws to limit working hours for employees is a positive development that prioritises the well-being of workers and promotes a healthier work-life balance. By ensuring that individuals have sufficient time for rest, leisure, and personal pursuits, such legislation contributes to overall societal welfare and economic prosperity.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use plainer wording Original: evolving dynamics of the modern workforce Suggested revision: changing nature of modern work Why it matters: The replacement states the idea more directly without an abstract phrase.
- 2. Use natural academic phrasing Original: opine Suggested revision: argue Why it matters: 'Argue that' is more natural and precise in an essay introduction.
- 3. Reduce nominalisation Original: primary motivation behind the implementation of laws limiting working hours Suggested revision: main reason for limits on working hours Why it matters: The concise noun phrase communicates the same idea more clearly.
- 4. Improve the collocation Original: safeguard the well-being and health of employees Suggested revision: protect employees' health and well-being Why it matters: The replacement uses a more natural verb and noun order.
- 5. Remove overlapping wording Original: Prolonged and excessive working hours Suggested revision: Excessively long working hours Why it matters: 'Prolonged' and 'excessive' overlap here, so the replacement is more concise.
- 6. Clarify the reference Original: This aimed Suggested revision: This initiative aimed Why it matters: Naming the initiative removes the vague reference of 'This'.
- 7. Use precise wording Original: overwork issues Suggested revision: problems caused by overwork Why it matters: The replacement identifies the relationship between overwork and the problems more clearly.
- 8. Improve the collocation Original: spreading Suggested revision: distributing Why it matters: 'Distributing' more naturally expresses opportunities reaching more people.
- 9. Use concise wording Original: increased spending on leisure activities Suggested revision: greater leisure spending Why it matters: The compact noun phrase preserves the meaning and avoids unnecessary wording.
- 10. Use natural phrasing Original: overall societal welfare Suggested revision: society's overall well-being Why it matters: The possessive construction is more natural and accessible.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: As employees have more free time due to shorter working hours, they may choose to spend their leisure time travelling to new destinations, dining out at restaurants, or attending concerts and events, stimulating the tourism, entertainment, and hospitality sectors. Suggested revision: With more free time, employees may travel, dine out, or attend events, thereby stimulating the tourism, entertainment, and hospitality sectors. Why it matters: The rewrite removes repetition and makes the causal progression easier to follow.
Suggested Rewrites
- evolving dynamics of the modern workforce changing nature of modern work
- opine argue
- primary motivation behind the implementation of laws limiting working hours main reason for limits on working hours
- safeguard the well-being and health of employees protect employees' health and well-being
- Prolonged and excessive working hours Excessively long working hours
- This aimed This initiative aimed
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay answers both questions directly and develops a convincing positive case through worker health, protection from exploitation, employment distribution, leisure spending, and wider economic benefits. Its strongest features are clear progression, precise academic language, and well-integrated explanations; the main limitation is that the Premium Friday example is an initiative rather than a statutory hours limit. Prioritise an exact legal example and briefly acknowledge implementation trade-offs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both the reasons for the laws and the positive judgement are fully developed with relevant causal explanation and an illustrative example.
Use an example of an enforceable working-hours law and briefly address possible costs for employers or workers seeking overtime.
Coherence and Cohesion
Focused paragraphs, clear topic sentences, and well-managed cause-and-effect links create strong logical progression throughout.
Trim the repeated list of leisure sectors and activities so the final body paragraph remains concise.
Lexical Resource
A wide, precise academic vocabulary conveys legislation, wellbeing, labour-market, and economic concepts with strong control.
Replace the slightly vague evolving dynamics and opine with more direct academic phrasing such as changing working conditions and argue.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately and flexibly, with only rare minor lapses that do not affect communication.
Refine occasional long causal sentences to avoid repeated participle clauses and maintain stylistic economy.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.