Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which one do you prefer? Use specific reasons to develop your essay.
Sample Response
Learning is a process that requires a strategic approach to gain the knowledge completely. Various proven approaches exist to learn different knowledge and skills. Traditionally, the teaching is done by an experienced teacher who is believed to have mastered the skill he teaches. However, some people believe that self-learning is a better approach and thus learn from books without the help of a tutor. However, it is preferred to have a teacher whenever possible. This can be proven by analysing how teachers follow a systematic approach, correct our mistakes, and provide valuable feedback to lead us to achieve success in learning. A systematic approach is essential in learning and it requires subject matter expertise to know the secrets of learning that particular subject. For example, the skills like swimming and driving require a systematic approach to learn them. Only an experienced tutor can teach such a skills and self-learning will not help in such scenarios. Moreover, self-learning may end up in dangerous situations if some learning steps go wrong. Thus, it is apparent that some skills require teachers to learn effectively. Mistakes are common in the learning process. A teacher can help the students by correcting their mistakes and also providing feedback whenever required. On the other hand, a self-learner may not know if he or she is making a mistake in the learning process and may end up learning it wrongly. For instance, a child learning mathematics without a teacher may end up using a wrong arithmetic formula as there is nobody to guide. This shows that a teacher's help in correction and suggestion is important to a successful learning process. In conclusion, it is apparent that a teacher can help students in learning by following a systematic learning style, and amend pupil's mistakes, and provide suggestions and feedback whenever required. Thus, it is a preferred way to learn with tutors.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural collocation Original: gain the knowledge completely Suggested revision: acquire knowledge effectively Why it matters: Knowledge is acquired, and learning is described as effective rather than complete.
- 2. Clarify countable meaning Original: different knowledge Suggested revision: different kinds of knowledge Why it matters: “Knowledge” is uncountable, so “kinds of” is needed for distinct types.
- 3. Remove unnecessary article Original: the teaching Suggested revision: teaching Why it matters: The activity is discussed generally, so no article is needed.
- 4. Use adjective form Original: However, it is preferred Suggested revision: It is preferable Why it matters: “Preferable” correctly describes the option, while removing a repetitive linker.
- 5. Avoid overclaiming Original: proven Suggested revision: demonstrated Why it matters: “Demonstrated” is more suitable for supporting an argument with analysis.
- 6. Use concise collocation Original: lead us to achieve success Suggested revision: help us succeed Why it matters: The replacement expresses the same result naturally and directly.
- 7. Correct preposition Original: in Suggested revision: for Why it matters: “Essential for” is the correct pattern before the activity.
- 8. Clarify reference Original: it requires subject matter expertise Suggested revision: this requires subject-matter expertise Why it matters: “This” refers clearly to following a systematic approach.
- 9. Use precise wording Original: know the secrets of learning Suggested revision: understand how to learn Why it matters: The original phrase is vague and unnatural in an academic argument.
- 10. Introduce examples formally Original: the skills like Suggested revision: skills such as Why it matters: “Such as” introduces examples more accurately than “the skills like.”
- 11. Use gerund pattern Original: learn Suggested revision: learning Why it matters: The preposition “to” in this noun phrase must be followed by a gerund.
- 12. Remove singular article Original: such a skills Suggested revision: such skills Why it matters: A plural noun cannot follow the singular article “a.”
Suggested Rewrites
- gain the knowledge completely acquire knowledge effectively
- different knowledge different kinds of knowledge
- the teaching teaching
- However, it is preferred It is preferable
- proven demonstrated
- lead us to achieve success help us succeed
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear preference for teacher-led learning and supports it with relevant examples from swimming, driving, and mathematics. Its strongest feature is the practical explanation of correction and safety; the main limitation is repetitive development and a single-block structure, alongside recurring language errors. Prioritise separate body paragraphs for systematic instruction and feedback, using more varied vocabulary and carefully controlled sentence patterns.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear preference is consistently supported by two relevant, developed reasons and specific practical examples.
Briefly acknowledge when self-study might work, then explain why teacher guidance remains preferable overall.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument has a logical two-reason progression, but the absence of paragraph breaks and substantial repetition weaken cohesion.
Separate systematic instruction and corrective feedback into distinct body paragraphs with concise topic sentences.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the topic, although repeated wording and several awkward combinations limit flexibility.
Vary repeated uses of 'learning' and 'systematic approach' and refine phrases such as 'gain the knowledge completely'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence structures communicates meaning clearly overall, despite recurring errors in articles, agreement, and parallelism.
Correct patterns such as 'such skills' and maintain parallel verb forms in lists, especially in the conclusion.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which one do you prefer? Use specific reasons to develop your essay.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.