We can access information from the Internet easily. Some people say that libraries are no longer necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
To acquire information, some deem that libraries are no longer necessary since modern communication technologies, especially the Internet, have advanced enough to provide the things netizens want. However, while people can enjoy certain convenience brought by such cutting-edge technologies, they may also risk losing some other essential things that brick-and-mortar libraries can offer.
To a certain extent, the Internet does have its edges. The most conspicuous one is that it provides the public with much more convenience. Taking full advantage of the colossal database established and information travelling fast on the Internet, netizens, by simply clicking on certain websites, can not only get informed at the moment when the latest news and resources have just been updated, but also dig the previous information rather than search through rows of shelves in a library. Meanwhile, the progresses of electronic devices have made it possible to search information via portable palm-sized gadgets, which is much more convenient. Besides, the cyberspace has also formed online platforms for net surfers to air their views fully and freely with others who share same interests.
However, never does this mean that libraries are no longer necessary since they have the functions which the Internet cannot serve. To illustrate, the stories written on newspapers, books, and magazines are authentic, since the strict censorship requires authors and editors to be certain about minute details. By stark contrast, the information shown on the Internet may be fabricated, as some people base their sense of self-worth on the number of ‘likes’ or ‘hearts’. Those idle gossips are very likely to mislead the netizens who lack the ability to seek or distinguish authoritative sources. Additionally, those who reckon that libraries are no longer needed also mistakenly view them as simple repositories of paper documents, but such facilities can actually offer sound environments for reading and studying.
In a nutshell, at present never can the Internet substitute for public libraries.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural reporting verb Original: deem Suggested revision: believe Why it matters: The verb phrase is unnecessarily formal and unnatural in this context.
- 2. Add a countable expression Original: certain convenience Suggested revision: a certain degree of convenience Why it matters: Convenience is uncountable here and needs a suitable quantity expression.
- 3. Use a precise noun Original: some other essential things Suggested revision: other essential resources Why it matters: Resources states more precisely what physical libraries provide.
- 4. Correct the idiom Original: edges Suggested revision: advantages Why it matters: Have its edges is not the appropriate idiom for describing benefits.
- 5. Use a natural adjective Original: conspicuous Suggested revision: obvious Why it matters: Obvious is more natural for identifying the clearest advantage.
- 6. Use uncountable progress Original: the progresses of electronic devices Suggested revision: progress in electronic devices Why it matters: Progress is uncountable and takes in when referring to development in a field.
- 7. Add the preposition Original: search information Suggested revision: search for information Why it matters: Search requires for when its object is the information being sought.
- 8. Avoid redundant wording Original: palm-sized gadgets Suggested revision: devices Why it matters: Portable already conveys the relevant size and mobility, so gadgets is needlessly informal.
- 9. Clarify the reference Original: which is much more convenient Suggested revision: making access much more convenient Why it matters: The relative pronoun has an unclear antecedent and weakens the connection to the result.
- 10. Remove the article Original: the cyberspace Suggested revision: cyberspace Why it matters: Cyberspace is normally used without the definite article in this general sense.
- 11. Use the right collocation Original: formed Suggested revision: provided Why it matters: Cyberspace can provide platforms, while formed is an unnatural verb choice here.
- 12. Use current terminology Original: net surfers Suggested revision: internet users Why it matters: Internet users is clearer and more appropriately formal than the dated phrase net surfers.
Suggested Rewrites
- deem believe
- certain convenience a certain degree of convenience
- some other essential things other essential resources
- edges advantages
- conspicuous obvious
- the progresses of electronic devices progress in electronic devices
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response presents a clear position, maintains it consistently, and develops a relevant contrast between online convenience and the continuing value of libraries. Its main limitation is that several supporting claims are broad or only partly relevant, while awkward collocations occasionally weaken precision; the highest-priority improvement is to develop fewer reasons with more specific, logically connected support.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear disagreement is sustained and supported with relevant reasons, although some claims are broad and the point about online discussion adds little to the central argument.
Develop each main reason with a precise example or explanation that directly proves why physical libraries remain necessary.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through a clear introduction, contrasting body sections, and a concise conclusion, with generally effective cohesive devices.
Tighten links within the body paragraphs so that every supporting sentence clearly advances the paragraph's central claim.
Lexical Resource
A wide range of topic vocabulary conveys meaning effectively, but several choices such as “edges,” “dig the previous information,” and “idle gossips” are unnatural.
Prioritize natural collocations and precise academic phrasing over conspicuous or overly figurative vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex structures are used with good control, while occasional article, agreement, and word-form errors do not impede communication.
Proofread complex sentences for articles, countability, and agreement, especially phrases such as “certain convenience” and “the progresses.”
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IELTS Writing Task 2
We can access information from the Internet easily. Some people say that libraries are no longer necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.