Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 8–8.5)

Sample Response

1

The inevitable closure of small, local shops in the face of competition from large supermarkets is a stark reality in many communities. This trend, driven by factors such as economies of scale and aggressive marketing strategies, has significant implications for the social fabric and economic well-being of theselocal communities. Addressing this issue requires a multi-pronged approach to empowernecessitates a multi-pronged approach that empowers local businesses and fosters community engagement.

2

One of the most immediate consequences of small traditional shop closuressmall and traditional shop closures is a loss of community identity and connectionthe loss of a sense of community identity and connection. Local shops often serve as hubs for social interaction, providing familiar spaces where residents can meet, exchange news, and build relationships. Their disappearance creates a void in the heart of the community, diminishing its vibrancy and sense of belonging. Furthermore, the economic impact of local shop closures is far-reaching. These businesses are often the backbone of local economies, employing residents and contributing to the local tax base. Their closure leads to job losses, reduced disposable income within the community, and ultimately, a decline in the area's overall economic activitya decline in the overall economic activity of the area.

3

Fortunately, several measures can mitigateseveral potential solutions can help mitigate the negative consequences of this trend and revitalize communities. Firstly, promoting public awareness about the importance of supporting local businesses is crucial. Local campaigns that highlight the unique offerings and benefits of shopping locally can encourage residents to make conscious choices that contribute to the well-being of their community. Additionally, initiatives such as "buy local" programmeslike "buy local" programmes and farmers' markets can provide platforms for local businesses to showcase their products and services, attracting new customers and increasing their visibility. For instance, a local bakery could participate in a farmers' market, offering fresh bread, pastries, and other baked goods to a wider audience and attracting new customers who may not have been aware of their shop before. Secondly, local governments can play a vital role in helping small businesses survive and growsupporting the survival and growth of small businesses. Implementing policies such as tax breaks, reduced rent for retail spaces, and streamlined licensing procedures can provide much-needed financial assistance and simpler administrationfinancial assistance and administrative ease.

4

In conclusion, the closure of small, local shops poses significant social and economic challenges to communities. By raising awareness about the importance of local businesses, implementing supportive policies, and fostering community engagement, we can create a more sustainable and resilient economic environment.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.5

The response’s strongest feature is its comprehensive, highly coherent treatment of both community effects and practical remedies, with relevant development and a well-integrated example. The main limitation is minor: some solution claims, particularly the government measures, are presented as a list rather than fully explaining how they would enable small shops to compete. The best refinement is to extend one policy mechanism and its likely outcome while trimming small areas of repetition.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

8.0
Scoring rule

Both questions are addressed directly and in depth through well-developed social and economic effects and a substantial range of plausible solutions.

Next step

Explain the mechanism and likely impact of one government policy more fully instead of ending that section with a list of measures.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.5
Scoring rule

The response is exceptionally easy to follow, with purposeful paragraphing, clear internal progression, and cohesive devices that rarely attract attention.

Next step

Reduce minor repetition of local businesses and community by using occasional referencing or tighter sentence combination.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.5
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is wide, precise, and natural, with sophisticated expressions used effectively across social, economic, and policy contexts.

Next step

Replace the slightly awkward phrase administrative ease with a more idiomatic expression such as a lower administrative burden.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

9.0
Scoring rule

The response demonstrates full and flexible control of varied complex structures, accurate punctuation, and consistently error-free sentences.

Next step

Maintain this level of control while varying the rhythm of the longest solution paragraph with one or two shorter sentences.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Your response

Words0
40:00

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