Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
The question of whether emergencies or positive stories should be featured on the news have been a recent topic of debate. Many believe we should try to focus on issues and situations of negative stories, whilst others believe that constant exposure to darker content on the news would cause people to turn away from news altogether. Personally, I believe that the news should maintain a balance of both positive and negative stories.
On the one hand, depressing or upsetting news might turn people away from watching them entirely, leading to a large contingent of people being under-informed. This is something cable news and traditional print media have failed to solve, as they prefer to maintain a pessimistic, sensationalist style of reporting in order to increase revenue. As a result, there has also been a recent sharp increase in, for example, the number of American youths who get their news through comedic news shows, as an effort to offset the gravity of the situations we are faced with every day.
On the other hand, it can be argued that focusing on ignoring negative issues will not make them go away, and informing the people of their existence might lead to better solutions. Countries and societies constantly need to change to adapt to pressing problems, and only by informing its citizens and involving them in the decision making process can solutions be found. For example, the prospect of a climate catastrophe is gloomy, however, if there was no coverage on it, it could be judged that there would not have been as many environmental movements as there are today.
In conclusion, I argue that news outlets have a delicate balance to strike - they must achieve their goal of remaining objectively informative, whilst also presenting an image of the world that does not negatively affect their viewership.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Unclear noun combination Original: issues and situations of negative stories Suggested revision: negative issues and events Why it matters: The original noun combination is unnatural and obscures the intended contrast.
- 2. Pronoun mismatch Original: watching them entirely Suggested revision: following the news entirely Why it matters: “News” is uncountable, so the plural pronoun “them” does not refer to it correctly.
- 3. Smoother example placement Original: increase in, for example, the number Suggested revision: increase in the number Why it matters: The interrupting phrase weakens the connection between “increase” and its complement.
- 4. Correct fixed phrase Original: as Suggested revision: in Why it matters: The standard expression is “in an effort to,” not “as an effort to.”
- 5. Use direct structure Original: situations we are faced with Suggested revision: situations we face Why it matters: The active construction is more concise and natural while preserving the meaning.
- 6. Remove conflicting verbs Original: focusing on ignoring Suggested revision: ignoring Why it matters: “Focusing on” conflicts semantically with the act of ignoring something.
- 7. Remove unnecessary article Original: informing the people Suggested revision: informing people Why it matters: The generic plural noun “people” does not need the definite article here.
- 8. Match plural subject Original: its Suggested revision: their Why it matters: The pronoun must agree with the plural subject “Countries and societies.”
- 9. Fix comma splice Original: is gloomy, however, Suggested revision: is gloomy; however, Why it matters: A semicolon is needed before “however” when it joins two independent clauses.
- 10. Use concise noun phrase Original: darker content on the news Suggested revision: negative news content Why it matters: The revised phrase is more concise and states the type of content directly.
- 11. Clarify audience action Original: turn away from news altogether Suggested revision: stop following the news altogether Why it matters: “Stop following” states the audience behaviour more precisely than “turn away.”
- 12. Avoid inflated wording Original: contingent Suggested revision: number Why it matters: “A large number” is the natural expression for an unspecified group in this context.
Suggested Rewrites
- issues and situations of negative stories negative issues and events
- watching them entirely following the news entirely
- increase in, for example, the number increase in the number
- as in
- situations we are faced with situations we face
- focusing on ignoring ignoring
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response's strongest feature is its balanced, clearly organised argument that explains both the disengaging effect of relentlessly negative news and the public value of reporting serious problems. Its main limitation is that the position only indirectly answers the extent-of-agreement wording, while some supporting claims are asserted rather than fully demonstrated. The priority is to state the degree of agreement explicitly and connect each example more precisely to harm for individuals or society.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear nuanced position is maintained and both sides are developed with relevant reasoning and examples, though the precise extent of agreement remains somewhat implicit.
State explicitly how far you agree that the reporting trend is harmful and make every example demonstrate that specific claim.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, two focused body paragraphs, and a consistent conclusion, with generally effective cohesive devices.
Strengthen the links between individual claims within each body paragraph so that the examples follow more directly from the preceding reasoning.
Lexical Resource
A broad and generally precise vocabulary supports the argument, including effective language for media practices and social consequences, despite several awkward collocations.
Refine combinations such as “situations of negative stories,” “focusing on ignoring,” and “coverage on it” to achieve more natural precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A varied range of complex structures is used successfully and meaning remains clear, although several agreement, pronoun-reference, and punctuation errors occur.
Proofread complex sentences for subject-verb agreement, consistent pronoun reference, and correct punctuation around linking adverbs such as “however.”
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.