Education is very important. How can children who are disinterested in the study to be motivated to learn? What is your opinion on that?
Sample Response
Education is highly essential these days. Parents give their best effort to make sure that their children get the highest quality of education. However, some challenges come up in pursuit of this goalin pursuit this goal. One of thethese biggest problems is students’ lack of awareness and attentionthe less of students’ awareness and attentiveness in learning.
Students in many cases usually take part in education because of pressure from parents and societyby force from parents and society. In other words, students are unaware of the learning process that they have been doing. It is believed thatIt is believed, they just want to make people around them proud or pleased. In fact, they pretend to like and enjoy these learning activities even though they do not enjoy studying very muchdo not like that much to study.
Meanwhile, improvements to the education systemthe improvement of education system offers several solutionsserves several kinds of solutions. In particular, varied methodsParticularly varying methods that are used in school or classroom can inspire kids to pay attention and enjoy their lessons. Education stakeholdersstockholders use different styles of teaching to suit students’ preferencesto combine with students’ preference. Indeed, children should feel enthusiastic and keep learning continually.
In addition, another solution is that children needthe next way out of this matter is children need a role model to show the real benefits of education. It is thought that children will learn from the examplefigure out based on the example that becoming a successful person meansto become a successful person; that means they have to study hard and vice versa. Moreover, the environment in which children grow upenvironment of children where they grow up also hashave a big influence. It means that the place where children are living can improve what they are doing.
Learning should be fun, at least to the children. The computer based and games based education systems that are adopted in many modern schools could be an effective way to engage the student in enjoying the learning. Learning through experience, fun, and sportsexperience, fund and sports are the best ways to attract kids to study more. Parents and teachers have to handle the whole learning process delicately to make the students enjoy the reading. Finally, children’s psychology can vary based on their inherent characteristics, family and economic conditions of their parents and that’s why teachers should pay special attentionattentions to each student and act accordingly to grab their attentions and focus on study.
In brief, being motivated students could reach closer to their dream. Many ways can lead to better education. A varying and suitable technique, portraying role model and getting support from the environment are pathways to be friendly with the study.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response offers several relevant ways to motivate children, particularly varied teaching, role models, enjoyable learning, and individual support, and its paragraph structure keeps the main direction understandable. However, explanations are often general or unclear, while frequent grammar and word-choice problems weaken precision. The highest-priority improvement is to select fewer solutions and develop each one through a clear cause-and-effect explanation expressed in accurate sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers the question with several relevant solutions and an identifiable view, but many ideas remain general or only partly explained.
Develop two or three principal methods with specific examples showing exactly how each would increase a disengaged child's motivation.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and basic signposting create an overall progression, though connections within and between some ideas are mechanical or unclear.
Give each body paragraph one controlling idea and arrange its supporting sentences in a clear cause-and-effect sequence.
Lexical Resource
The response has enough topic vocabulary to discuss motivation and education, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations reduce precision.
Review word forms and common collocations, especially phrases involving attention, role models, learning activities, and educational stakeholders.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex forms are both attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, clause structure, and plurals sometimes strain readability.
Prioritise complete clause structures and subject-verb agreement before adding longer modifying phrases or coordinated ideas.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Education is very important. How can children who are disinterested in the study to be motivated to learn? What is your opinion on that?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.