Nowadays nurses should not just be required to do basic training but they must have other qualities as well to do their jobs well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Some feel nurses need to learn more than just the basic requirements of their jobs in order to be effective. In my opinion, nursing indeed requires a wide range of skills.
Detractors point out the essential role of a nurse can be streamlined. There are many countries where nurses undergo some fairly simple vocational training and are then considered qualified professionals. Most only need to perform limited basic tasks such as taking blood, checking vitals, monitoring patients, and referring urgent matters to doctors. For a hospital purely concerned with optimising profits, it makes sense that they would train nurses to a minimum standard and pay lower salaries, with the expectation of high turnover. As long as nurses can perform certain discrete skills, there is no incentive to invest more in their training.
In practice, however, nurses occupy roles outside than their literal job description. In most hospitals, nurses spend a lot of time double checking the medicines doctors are administering, learning new procedures, and counseling patients. The patients likely communicate more with nurses than busy doctors and therefore rely on them not only for medical advice but also psychological support. These emotional tasks, in my opinion, justify increased training. Even though this will not have a clearly measurable outcome, it will result in nurses who are better equipped to deal with a variety of situations and patients who do not feel like customers buying their health from a corporation.
In conclusion, despite legitimate concerns related to its value, it is crucial nurses be capable of taking on a number of roles. This will have benefits not only for the nurses themselves but also their patients and society at large.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise attribution Original: Some feel Suggested revision: Some people believe Why it matters: The revision states clearly who holds the view and uses a more suitable reporting verb.
- 2. Make wording concise Original: the basic requirements of their jobs Suggested revision: basic job requirements Why it matters: The shorter noun phrase conveys the same meaning more directly.
- 3. Refine the description Original: some fairly simple vocational training Suggested revision: relatively straightforward vocational training Why it matters: This wording is more precise and appropriately formal.
- 4. Clarify the range Original: limited basic tasks Suggested revision: a limited range of basic tasks Why it matters: The revision makes it clear that the number of tasks, rather than each task itself, is limited.
- 5. Fix pronoun structure Original: it makes sense that they would train nurses Suggested revision: it makes sense to train nurses Why it matters: The infinitive removes the unclear plural pronoun referring back to a singular hospital.
- 6. Correct the expression Original: outside than their literal job description Suggested revision: beyond their formal job description Why it matters: 'Beyond' is the correct preposition for duties that exceed a stated job description.
- 7. Restore parallel structure Original: but also psychological support Suggested revision: but also for psychological support Why it matters: Repeating 'for' makes the two objects of 'rely on them' grammatically parallel.
- 8. Use precise category Original: These emotional tasks Suggested revision: These interpersonal responsibilities Why it matters: The revision describes patient communication and psychological support more accurately.
- 9. Clarify the reference Original: its value Suggested revision: the value of additional training Why it matters: The explicit noun phrase removes ambiguity about what 'its' refers to.
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: Detractors point out the essential role of a nurse can be streamlined. Suggested revision: Detractors point out that the essential duties of a nurse can be streamlined. Why it matters: The rewrite adds the required complement marker and replaces the awkward singular idea of a nurse's role.
Suggested Rewrites
- Some feel Some people believe
- the basic requirements of their jobs basic job requirements
- some fairly simple vocational training relatively straightforward vocational training
- limited basic tasks a limited range of basic tasks
- it makes sense that they would train nurses it makes sense to train nurses
- outside than their literal job description beyond their formal job description
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is persuasive, mature, and tightly organised, with a clear position supported through a well-developed contrast between minimum technical duties and nurses' broader responsibilities. The main limitation is a small amount of imprecise phrasing, especially in describing roles beyond a job description. The best refinement would be to sharpen those few expressions and make the relationship between additional qualities and formal training even more explicit.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the question directly, sustains a clear position, and develops both the opposing rationale and its rebuttal in depth.
State more explicitly which additional qualities require training so the central claim is matched even more precisely to the task wording.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically across well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices guide the contrast without becoming intrusive.
Refine the transition from the counterargument to the preferred position so the rebuttal relationship is even more immediate.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise, and flexible, with effective choices for discussing professional duties, economics, and patient care.
Polish the few unnatural combinations, particularly the wording about roles beyond the literal job description.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, and the isolated preposition error does not impede communication.
Proofread complex comparative and prepositional constructions to eliminate the small number of local slips.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays nurses should not just be required to do basic training but they must have other qualities as well to do their jobs well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.