Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings?
Sample Response
Some people think that old, historic buildings are no need for the city and they should be destroyed and replaced with modern ones. However, other people believe that historic buildings must be preserved in order to know and remember our past. For several reasons that I will mention bellow I agree with those people who want to preserve old, historical buildings.
First of all, by preserving historical buildings we pass our history to our future generations. I think that out children should know their history, learn from it and respect it. People need to know their traditions and customs, which are priceless and irreplaceable. Our history is our knowledge and power. From my opinion we need to preserve and restore historical buildings. By destroying them we show our disrespect to our forefathers and their traditions.
Second of all, by preserving historical buildings a city can attract many travelers. Welcoming tourists a city can get many benefits including money, which can be spent on preserving historical buildings as well as on improving roads and facilities.
Also, many tourists mean a lot of new business opportunities. Another important aspect of this is that businessmen will be willing to build new recreational centers, hotels, movie theaters, shopping centers to make a city more attractive for travelers. In addition to those practical benefits, many people will have the opportunity to get a job. All this is good for the economy of the city.
To sum up, I believe that preserving old, historical buildings can bring only benefits to a city and all humankind.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct the clause structure Original: are no need for the city Suggested revision: are not needed in the city Why it matters: The original phrase uses need in an ungrammatical construction.
- 2. Clarify the purpose Original: in order to know and remember our past Suggested revision: to help us understand and remember our past Why it matters: Buildings can help people understand the past, so the revised wording states the relationship more naturally.
- 3. Fix spelling and punctuation Original: bellow I agree Suggested revision: below, I agree Why it matters: Below is the correct spelling, and the introductory phrase requires a comma.
- 4. Use the correct collocation Original: pass our history to our future generations Suggested revision: pass our history on to future generations Why it matters: Pass something on to someone is the natural collocation for transmitting knowledge or heritage.
- 5. Correct the possessive word Original: out Suggested revision: our Why it matters: Our is the required possessive determiner.
- 6. Use the standard phrase Original: From Suggested revision: In Why it matters: In my opinion is the conventional English expression for introducing a viewpoint.
- 7. Use a natural collocation Original: show our disrespect to Suggested revision: show disrespect for Why it matters: Show disrespect for is the natural collocation in this context.
- 8. Use a formal transition Original: Second of all Suggested revision: Secondly Why it matters: Secondly is a more concise and suitably formal sequencing expression.
- 9. Clarify the opening modifier Original: Welcoming tourists a city can get Suggested revision: By welcoming tourists, a city can gain Why it matters: By and the comma make the means-result relationship grammatically clear.
- 10. Use a precise causal phrase Original: many tourists mean a lot of new business opportunities Suggested revision: tourism creates many new business opportunities Why it matters: The revision states the economic relationship more directly and formally.
- 11. Use the accurate noun Original: businessmen Suggested revision: investors Why it matters: Investors more precisely identifies the people willing to finance new facilities.
Suggested Rewrites
- are no need for the city are not needed in the city
- in order to know and remember our past to help us understand and remember our past
- bellow I agree below, I agree
- pass our history to our future generations pass our history on to future generations
- out our
- From In
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear position and develops two relevant benefits of preserving historic buildings, especially cultural continuity and tourism-led economic gains. Its main limitation is recurring awkward or inaccurate language, alongside somewhat mechanical transitions and repetition. The priority is to improve grammatical control and collocation while presenting each supporting idea in more natural, precisely connected sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained throughout, and the cultural and economic reasons are relevant and sufficiently extended, though some claims are overgeneralised.
Qualify absolute claims such as preservation bringing “only benefits” and support the argument with a more specific example or acknowledgement of practical trade-offs.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a logical progression, but formulaic sequencing and the division of the tourism argument across two paragraphs make cohesion somewhat mechanical.
Group the tourism and employment points into one unified paragraph and use meaning-based transitions instead of repeated listing phrases.
Lexical Resource
There is a sufficient range of topic vocabulary, but several spelling errors and awkward collocations reduce precision and naturalness.
Correct forms such as “bellow” and learn natural combinations such as “there is no need for” and “in my opinion.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex structures, but recurring errors in phrasing, prepositions, possessives, and clause construction are noticeable.
Proofread sentence openings and dependent clauses, especially constructions like “Welcoming tourists a city can get,” to ensure clear grammatical relationships.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.