Nowadays many people prefer to use private cars. What problems has this trend created? What solutions can you suggest?
Sample Response
To make one’s journey hassle-free, currently, individuals are interested in using their personal vehicles more. This trend has created enormous hurdles such as traffic congestion, and to reduce the adverse effect of it, car-pooling and many other alternatives have been suggested.
First off, individuals have to wait for a bus for a long time sometimes to reach their workplace while many times to meet their loved ones. Therefore, people like to visit by their own vehicle, and this has created many obstacles. In other words, traffic on the road increases; resultantly, it becomes hard for pedestrians to walk on the road. Now and then, congested places become the cause of accidents on the road. Moreover, increasing preference for using one’s own car has given rise to car rage. Many times, it has been noticed that persons get serious injuries in order to overtake others, and they develop false pride in it. Most youngsters do it to belittle others.
On the other hand, such kinds of problems can be solved. Carpooling is one of the effective measures to control it. Individuals can share their rides with others, and thus, they can save not only the money that they spend on refuelling their car but also build attractions and good rapport. For instance, a few metropolitan areas are now less crowded due to sharing rides and employees and students reach their residence before the earlier time. Now they spare some time to pursue their hobbies, and they spend it with their families. Thus they are able to maintain a work-life balance. Also adding additional features in buses trains will reduce the interest of masses to use cars for that run on traditional fuels.
To conclude, it is apparent that traffic congestion burden on the pockets of people to refuel their vehicles are a few problems which the masses experience. Sharing rides, making public transport attractive by adding extra features, namely comfortable seats, air-conditioner, LED can make people use public transport more; instead of using their private vehicles.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise wording Original: enormous hurdles Suggested revision: significant problems Why it matters: This phrase states the negative impact more precisely and naturally.
- 2. Fix reference and number Original: the adverse effect of it Suggested revision: its adverse effects Why it matters: The possessive determiner and plural noun create a grammatical, concise reference to the trend.
- 3. Correct travel collocation Original: visit by their own vehicle Suggested revision: travel in their own vehicle Why it matters: People travel in a vehicle rather than visit by a vehicle.
- 4. Use natural connector Original: resultantly Suggested revision: as a result Why it matters: This connector expresses the consequence more naturally in formal prose.
- 5. Clarify cause Original: congested places become the cause of accidents Suggested revision: congestion causes accidents Why it matters: The revision expresses the causal relationship directly and idiomatically.
- 6. Use correct term Original: car Suggested revision: road Why it matters: Road rage is the established term for aggressive behaviour by drivers.
- 7. Improve injury collocation Original: persons get serious injuries Suggested revision: people suffer serious injuries Why it matters: Suffer serious injuries is the natural collocation in this context.
- 8. Clarify relationship Original: in order to overtake others Suggested revision: while attempting to overtake others Why it matters: The original purpose phrase wrongly suggests that injury is the aim of overtaking.
- 9. Remove redundancy Original: such kinds of problems Suggested revision: such problems Why it matters: Such already identifies the kind, so the extra wording is redundant.
- 10. Fix pronoun reference Original: measures to control it Suggested revision: measures to reduce these problems Why it matters: The plural reference clearly points back to the problems being discussed.
- 11. Use natural expression Original: reach their residence Suggested revision: return home Why it matters: Return home is the more natural expression for this meaning.
- 12. Fix comparison Original: before the earlier time Suggested revision: earlier than before Why it matters: A comparative adjective requires than to compare the new and previous arrival times.
Suggested Rewrites
- enormous hurdles significant problems
- the adverse effect of it its adverse effects
- visit by their own vehicle travel in their own vehicle
- resultantly as a result
- congested places become the cause of accidents congestion causes accidents
- car road
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the task and offers a clear range of problems and practical remedies, with the carpooling discussion providing the strongest development. However, several causal claims and examples are vague or implausible, while frequent awkward phrasing and grammatical errors weaken precision; the highest priority is to develop fewer points with clearer cause-and-effect reasoning and more controlled sentence structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both problems and solutions are addressed, but some supporting claims are vague, implausible, or insufficiently explained.
Develop fewer problems and solutions through explicit, credible cause-and-effect explanations and specific support.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure is clear and progression is generally easy to follow, although some linking is mechanical or inaccurate.
Use transitions that reflect the precise relationship between ideas and tighten connections within longer sentences.
Lexical Resource
The response shows a useful range of topic vocabulary, but recurring collocational and word-choice errors reduce naturalness and precision.
Prioritise accurate common collocations for transport, congestion, public services, and social effects.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms is attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, clause structure, and punctuation sometimes strain clarity.
Build complex sentences from accurately controlled clauses and proofread systematically for agreement and missing function words.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays many people prefer to use private cars. What problems has this trend created? What solutions can you suggest?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.