Some people say that public libraries should be free, otherwise they are just a waste of money, especially because modern technologies and the internet allow easy access to resources. Discuss and give your point of view on this issue.
Sample Response
Some people believe that library should be made available to the public without entrance fee because new arising modern technology and internet access can already provide information resources. Nonetheless, most people will no longer visit the library. However, others argue that it should have an entrance and membership fee. We can never deny those people who believe that library should impose entrance and membership fees to the public. The funds are needed for the maintenance of the facilities and purchasing of new books. Library is still important because it is a quiet place where people can read the books peacefully. Nowadays, there are various web pages on the internet that can provide similar information as in the library. Nevertheless, the convenience of the place is much more calming for the reader. The reader cannot concentrate on reading information on computer shop because of the noise from other users. It is widely true that information from the internet has several adverts, and it interrupts on comprehending the information. Therefore, the library is still important for the readers. It does not rely on electricity. It is conventional and boundless. There is not health and mental hazards on reading in the library that might happen due to excessive use of a computer. However, some people point out that library should be free to users. It is widely believed that the aim of good governance is to educate certain people in the society. Public libraries should be made free and accessible to the majority of people. There are certain groups of people who want to acquire information; nonetheless, they are restricted because of the fine imposed in the library. For instance, the impoverished group is not given the opportunity to finish their studies. As a result, if the library can only be free to the public, therefore the impoverished can acquire simple knowledge despite the lack of education at school. They cannot be displaced to other social economic group because they have knowledge that is comparable to educated ones. The information in the public library is vast. It has resources that are being taught at the school. The free entrance of public library is beneficial in displacing people from ignorance. Overall, in my opinion, libraries should be free for all because it will help the community to become successful if most people are inclined in reading instead of being astray such as drinking or committing crimes. The community will develop if the majority of people are knowledgeable.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use plural noun Original: library should be made available Suggested revision: libraries should be made available Why it matters: Use the plural when referring to public libraries in general.
- 2. Add article Original: without entrance fee Suggested revision: without an entrance fee Why it matters: A singular countable noun needs an article here.
- 3. Use natural collocation Original: new arising modern technology Suggested revision: emerging modern technology Why it matters: Emerging is the natural adjective for newly developing technology.
- 4. Show the consequence Original: Nonetheless, most people will no longer visit the library Suggested revision: As a result, fewer people may visit the library Why it matters: The replacement makes the stated consequence follow logically from online access.
- 5. Clarify the subject Original: it should have an entrance and membership fee Suggested revision: libraries should charge entrance and membership fees Why it matters: The plural subject and verb state the fee policy clearly.
- 6. Correct verb pattern Original: impose entrance and membership fees to the public Suggested revision: charge the public entrance and membership fees Why it matters: Charge takes the people paying as its direct object.
- 7. Make forms parallel Original: for the maintenance of the facilities and purchasing of new books Suggested revision: to maintain the facilities and purchase new books Why it matters: Parallel infinitive verbs make the two uses of funds grammatically balanced.
- 8. Correct comparison Original: similar information as in the library Suggested revision: information similar to that available in the library Why it matters: Similar is followed by to, and that supplies a clear comparison.
- 9. Choose precise adjective Original: much more calming for the reader Suggested revision: much calmer for readers Why it matters: Calmer describes the environment more naturally than calming in this comparison.
- 10. Fix preposition Original: on computer shop Suggested revision: in a computer shop Why it matters: A person is in a shop, and the singular noun needs an article.
- 11. Use natural phrasing Original: interrupts on comprehending the information Suggested revision: interferes with comprehension Why it matters: Interferes with accurately expresses how adverts impede understanding.
- 12. Fix agreement and form Original: There is not health and mental hazards Suggested revision: There are no physical or mental health hazards Why it matters: The plural noun requires are, and the coordinated modifiers need a natural form.
Suggested Rewrites
- library should be made available libraries should be made available
- without entrance fee without an entrance fee
- new arising modern technology emerging modern technology
- Nonetheless, most people will no longer visit the library As a result, fewer people may visit the library
- it should have an entrance and membership fee libraries should charge entrance and membership fees
- impose entrance and membership fees to the public charge the public entrance and membership fees
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response states a clear preference for free public libraries and offers relevant arguments about maintenance, access, and educational opportunity. However, discussion is often repetitive or logically unclear, while the absence of paragraphing and frequent awkward language make the argument harder to follow. Prioritise grouping the two sides into purposeful paragraphs and developing each claim with a precise explanation or realistic example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response discusses charging fees and free access and gives a clear opinion, but several supporting claims are repetitive, unclear, or insufficiently explained.
Develop one focused argument for each side with a clear cause-and-effect explanation, then justify the final preference directly.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument has a broadly recognisable sequence, but it is presented as one long paragraph and relies on repetitive or inaccurately used linking expressions.
Separate the introduction, fee argument, free-access argument, and conclusion into paragraphs, using links only where the logical relationship is clear.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss libraries, technology, and social access, but frequent unnatural collocations and imprecise word choices reduce clarity.
Replace awkward phrases with precise combinations such as public access, maintenance costs, reliable information, and overcome educational disadvantage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts both simple and complex sentences, but frequent article, agreement, preposition, and clause-construction errors sometimes make ideas difficult to follow.
Proofread each sentence for articles and subject-verb agreement, then simplify clauses whose grammatical relationship is unclear.