It is believed that people who read for pleasure develop their imagination more and acquire better language skills compared to people who prefer watching television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
The two crucial faces of media are magazines and television. In the 21st century, to acquire the efficient skills of creativity, one has to thoroughly follow both sources. However, people believe that individuals who read for entertainment purposes are more intuitive in comparison to people who while away time in front of the television. I partially agree with this opinion. The supportive arguments along with my views are being elucidated below.
Visual effects are an eye feast to more people than words. Subsequently, television is awarded as the prime entertainment device. Even though I affirm that book reading should be compulsory for kids, I conclude that practicals are more essential than theory. To explain in detail; children tend to learn from books but, when the same concept is shown through a video they grasp more easily. Moreover, television provokes the thought processing units, wherein humans learn humungous from watching tv. For example, the tiny-tots rather, than learning rhymes from text-books find the rhymes more interesting when watched on tv and try to enact the same, thus bringing out their budding talents.
On the contrary, television curbs away the ingenious talent of oneself. For example, the acts shown on television are already scripted and directed by someone. whereas, the magazines and various articles showcase us with different stories and scenarios. Consequently, an individual through their artistic talent can portray them. To quote an example, a well-acclaimed book can be directed in different ways by different technicians as each person has their vision. Hence the essence of learning a language is flexibility through reading books.
Although it’s believed that acclimatizing to our circumstances is necessary for our existence, searching for a suitable way lies in our hands. Hence, books or television should be used as a medium to elevate our inner originative talent but they should not overpower our inborn talents.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Choose the right noun Original: two crucial faces Suggested revision: two main forms Why it matters: Magazines and television are forms of media rather than faces of it.
- 2. Use natural wording Original: efficient skills of creativity Suggested revision: creative skills Why it matters: The original phrase combines words that do not form a natural collocation.
- 3. Use precise wording Original: thoroughly follow both sources Suggested revision: engage fully with both media Why it matters: People engage with media rather than follow sources in this context.
- 4. Match the intended meaning Original: intuitive Suggested revision: imaginative Why it matters: 'Imaginative' matches the claim about developing imagination, while 'intuitive' has a different meaning.
- 5. Add possessive determiner Original: while away time Suggested revision: while away their time Why it matters: The idiom requires a possessive determiner before 'time'.
- 6. Use natural comparison Original: an eye feast to more people Suggested revision: more appealing to many people Why it matters: The original expression is unidiomatic and obscures the comparison with words.
- 7. Show the causal link Original: Subsequently Suggested revision: For this reason Why it matters: The sentence presents a consequence rather than a later event in time.
- 8. Correct the collocation Original: awarded Suggested revision: regarded Why it matters: A device can be regarded as important but is not 'awarded as' something.
- 9. Use the correct term Original: practicals Suggested revision: practical experience Why it matters: The noun 'practicals' does not express the intended contrast with theory naturally here.
- 10. Fix introductory punctuation Original: To explain in detail; Suggested revision: To explain in detail, Why it matters: An introductory phrase should be followed by a comma, not a semicolon.
- 11. Place the comma correctly Original: books but, Suggested revision: books, but Why it matters: The comma belongs before the coordinating conjunction.
- 12. Use a standard term Original: thought processing units Suggested revision: thought processes Why it matters: The original phrase is not a standard expression for mental activity.
Suggested Rewrites
- two crucial faces two main forms
- efficient skills of creativity creative skills
- thoroughly follow both sources engage fully with both media
- intuitive imaginative
- while away time while away their time
- an eye feast to more people more appealing to many people
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response offers a recognisable comparison and uses relevant examples to show how television may support learning and how reading may encourage individual interpretation. Its position and conclusion remain vague, however, and the discussion only loosely addresses both imagination and language skills, while strained wording weakens precision. The highest priority is to state a consistent degree of agreement and develop direct comparisons against each part of the claim.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A partial-agreement position is stated and both media are discussed, but the central claims about imagination and language skills receive limited and sometimes indirect treatment.
Organise the argument around separate direct comparisons of reading and television for imagination and for language development, then restate a precise position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and the broad contrast between television and reading are clear, although some transitions are mechanical and several ideas do not connect cleanly to the main claim.
Give each body paragraph one explicit comparative claim and make every example explain that claim before moving to the next point.
Lexical Resource
There is a reasonably broad vocabulary, but frequent unnatural or inaccurate choices such as inflated descriptions and awkward collocations reduce precision.
Prefer accurate, conventional academic expressions and check that ambitious words convey the intended meaning in their immediate context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied sentence forms and is generally understandable, despite recurring punctuation, article, agreement, and sentence-fragment errors.
Proofread clause boundaries and sentence openings carefully, especially after linking expressions, and remove misplaced commas that interrupt grammatical structure.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is believed that people who read for pleasure develop their imagination more and acquire better language skills compared to people who prefer watching television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.