Some people prefer to eat at restaurants while others prefer to prepare and eat at home. Which one do you prefer?
Sample Response
There is no gainsaying in the fact that restaurant business is flourishing like never before. In earlier days, there were only a few restaurants where people visited on special occasions. But now, we have eateries in every nook and corner of the city; which are swamped with people of all ages. Admittedly, I too like to go and eat at restaurants but occasionally and prefer to cook and eat at home daily. There is no comparison of the freshly home-cooked meal to restaurant food. Every raw material is handpicked, fresh vegetables, good quality oil, and condiments are used, which not only increases the nutrition values of food but is delicious too. We are sure that the food cooked is hygienic whereas we are not sure of the quality of ingredients used in the restaurant and its hygienic condition. Recently in Kerala, India there were live worms were found in chicken in KFC store which is a renowned food chain across the world. On further investigation, it was found the products used were expired. Many people find cooking as a stress busting activity too. Family members can help each other in daily cooking and hence can spend quality time with each other. This way, they can also extol the importance of home cooked food to children. These days obesity is a very common problem which arises due to wrong eating habits and eating outside frequently is the major cause. Restaurant food is often fried and hence lots of calories, cholesterol, unsaturated fat which not makes us fat but slowly results in diseases like heart attack and diabetes. Apart from this, we also squander a lot of money when we at the restaurant frequently; which could otherwise be saved or used for other purposes. In a nutshell, home cooked meal is not only healthy and hygienic but can be interesting too. One can try making one dish in several by experimenting with ingredients. Parents should encourage their children to eat at home and inculcate the habit of cooking right from the childhood.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Add definite article Original: restaurant business Suggested revision: the restaurant business Why it matters: The article is needed when referring to the restaurant industry as a whole.
- 2. Restore parallel clauses Original: but occasionally and prefer Suggested revision: but only occasionally, and I prefer Why it matters: The second coordinated verb needs an explicit subject, and only should directly modify occasionally.
- 3. Generalize the noun Original: used in the restaurant Suggested revision: used in restaurants Why it matters: The plural form is needed because the statement concerns restaurants generally rather than one identified restaurant.
- 4. Use natural expression Original: its hygienic condition Suggested revision: their hygiene standards Why it matters: Hygiene standards is the natural expression, and their agrees with the plural restaurants.
- 5. Remove double verb Original: there were live worms were found Suggested revision: live worms were found Why it matters: The sentence incorrectly combines an existential construction with a passive verb.
- 6. Fix articles and preposition Original: in chicken in KFC store Suggested revision: in chicken at a KFC outlet Why it matters: The singular countable place needs an article, and at correctly identifies the business location.
- 7. Add reporting conjunction Original: it was found the products Suggested revision: it was found that the products Why it matters: That is required to introduce the reported clause clearly.
- 8. Remove incorrect preposition Original: find cooking as Suggested revision: find cooking Why it matters: Find takes the object cooking directly before the following complement.
- 9. Use natural preposition Original: in Suggested revision: with Why it matters: Help with is the natural construction for assisting in an activity.
- 10. Clarify the intended action Original: extol the importance of home cooked food to children Suggested revision: teach children the importance of home-cooked food Why it matters: Teach communicates passing this value to children more naturally and directly than extol to.
- 11. Supply the main verb Original: hence lots of calories, cholesterol, unsaturated fat Suggested revision: therefore contains many calories, cholesterol and unsaturated fat Why it matters: The clause needs a finite verb to state what restaurant food contains.
- 12. Complete correlative form Original: which not makes us fat Suggested revision: which not only contributes to weight gain Why it matters: Not only correctly pairs with the following but and avoids the ungrammatical word order.
Suggested Rewrites
- restaurant business the restaurant business
- but occasionally and prefer but only occasionally, and I prefer
- used in the restaurant used in restaurants
- its hygienic condition their hygiene standards
- there were live worms were found live worms were found
- in chicken in KFC store in chicken at a KFC outlet
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response states a clear preference and offers a substantial range of relevant reasons, including hygiene, health, family time, and cost. Its effectiveness is reduced by the absence of paragraphing and by frequent grammatical and collocational errors, although the message remains understandable. The highest-priority improvement is to organise the reasons into focused paragraphs and edit each sentence for complete clause structure and accurate word combinations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The preference for home cooking is clear and supported by several relevant, generally developed reasons and an example.
Develop fewer reasons more selectively and connect each one directly to why eating at home is preferable.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a broadly logical sequence, but the single unbroken paragraph and some loose linking weaken overall organisation.
Divide the response into an introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with one controlling idea in each paragraph.
Lexical Resource
The response shows a fairly wide vocabulary, but awkward collocations and word forms occur repeatedly despite clear meaning.
Use more natural combinations such as "nutritional value," "stress-relieving activity," and "home-cooked meals" consistently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is some structural variety, but frequent errors in clause formation, agreement, articles, and punctuation reduce accuracy.
Eliminate double-verb and missing-verb constructions by checking that every clause has one clear, correctly formed predicate.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people prefer to eat at restaurants while others prefer to prepare and eat at home. Which one do you prefer?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.